She Ain’t Heavy, She’s My Sister

It’s moments like this which make me so pleased that we were able to provide a sister (or sibling) for Callum and that we decided to try in the first place. There were discussions as to whether we would count our blessings with one child or did we try for a brother or sister for Callum. Both having siblings ourselves, we decided we wanted to offer Callum the experiences a sibling can provide and a chance to learn many a lesson from each other.

Callum is so helpful with Millie and has recently been asking if he can help her with her coat and shoes. He struggles with the buckle of the shoes but can happily take her coat on or off, managing the buttons just fine.

(Sorry about the quality of photos – having to use camera on an old phone at the moment)

Callum really does look out for Millie. Over Christmas, I had to work a couple of days while Stuart looked after the children. One particular day, they had run rings round Stuart and he was at the end of his tether so when Millie picked up Callum’s milk and poured it over his head, he was not best pleased and got cross with Millie…actually, there were a couple of other times that day where Millie tested his patience.

So, as soon as I put my key in the door, Callum was there: “Daddy shouted at Millie 3 times today!”.

If ever we say Millie is being naughty, he’ll jump in to defend her saying she isn’t naughty.

It makes me look forward to the future and I hope this is what it will always be like for them – wanting to help one another, be there for one another, stick up for one another. Callum, though sometimes he does get cross with Millie himself, ultimately is the caring big brother.

In time, as Millie gets older, I hope that Millie appreciates what she has in a brother like Callum rather than resents it. Knowing how her personality is shining through all ready, she’ll use it to her advantage and have him wrapped around her little finger! The best I could wish for is that Millie is there to stick up for her brother in just the same way.

They may not be close in age now but as they get older those years will dissolve into nothing, feeling more like minutes rather than years. I hope they continue to grow closer too.

 

With this Post I’m excited to be joining up with Dear Beautiful’s Siblings Linky. Please do visit her and the other blogs that are part of this link too. It’s such a beautiful idea.

There’s Only One Callum Bun

Callum

My little big boy is really blossoming into a lovely person. He has slotted into school life with no effort at all. I’d heard of other children struggling with the first term and their behaviour deteriorating and if Callum had gone to school in September 2012 I’m pretty sure he would’ve been the same but being the oldest in his year at the start of September 2013, he was so ready. Stuart and I went to a parent’s evening before Christmas and the teacher was happy with where he was at. His learning progress wasn’t anything to wow about (every parent wants to hear their child is a genius and the top of the class) but he was where his teacher expected him to be…for a boy! One thing I was proud of was his behaviour. He would sit and listen and would stick with something he was asked to do until he was finished. The other thing was that he had lots of friends. That was enough for us to squash any concerns we may have had!

I’ve recently started to notice a real improvement in his reading. He brings home a couple of books a week from school and carefully sounds out the words but is needing less and less help. Likewise, his writing is getting better and less HUGE. When he sees his homework book, he always wants to write something in it. We rarely follow the requested homework (bad mummy) as it often asks for Callum to draw a picture of what he has done and Callum, although loves putting pencil to paper as if to draw, is no artist! He rarely draws a recogniseable picture and prefers to scribble anything and tell you its a picture of something. Instead, we practice writing and counting and maths. We do it during the course of the day as a natural thing but don’t always document it in his book as by the time I get round to writing in it, I’ve forgotten what it was we’ve done. I’m pleased that his school doesn’t push the homework too much and rather just encourages you to complete it at this stage and the tasks are set more as ideas – well that’s my interpretation!

When I think about Callum, more than his educational progress, I think about his character, loving spirit and what a wonderful big brother he is.

For example, he baked cakes at his after school club the other week and was allowed to take 2 cakes home early (before decorating as they had more than they needed) so he tells me one is for him and the other is for Millie. A couple of days later, he brings home three decorated cakes who he announces are for him, Millie and Daddy. He doesn’t expect to eat them all himself and I don’t prompt him, he wants to share with others. If he has a banana and Millie wants some, he’ll often share it with her.

Of course, he will often say he is ‘helping’ Millie with her toys as an excuse to play with them himself and will hog the ‘best toys’ regardless of who they belong to, to himself but he does interact with her and play with her. But Millie will always want whatever Callum is playing with.

It always amazes me how someone is brought into their life and they are not told to love this new intrusion but somehow they do and it is clearly evident how much Callum loves Millie. When I pick Callum and Millie up from nursery (his after school club is attached to the nursery), I pick up Millie first then Callum. It isn’t me he runs to hug hello, it is Millie! He genuinely cares for her.

In many ways, he is a typical little boy – he whinges, as I said in Millie’s post, he is a wimp when he bumps himself (tough love mother!), he tries to get out of washing his face and cleaning his teeth, he drags everything out to take so much longer than necessary, especially when you are in a hurry. He has already developed the teenager trait of not wanting to get out of bed on a school day and has uttered the words “I hate you” (to which I unhelpfully laughed!). He loves Superheroes and PowerRangers and spends far too much time on the iPad!

These posts of Callum and Millie aren’t meant as boasts of ‘look how wonderful my child is’ but as parents is it so wrong to be proud of your child and look for their good traits. I’m sure we tell them off and moan about them enough too so it is good to praise them and ourselves when what they are doing is right, surely?

It is easy to get caught up in the bad moments sometimes, and only see them but if you take a step back and look at the overall picture, I can’t help but be proud of how he is turning out and hope that it is as a result of Stuart and my parenting…somewhere!

Then I look forward to the years ahead – he is going to pay me back when he gets to his teenage years isn’t he!?

You may have noticed that I’m last in line for cuddles (I do get lots) and that I may not be the one he wants to share his cakes with but when asked “Daddy or chips?” he chose chips!

Callum in January VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

Siblings: So Happy Together

When Stuart and I made (hopeful) plans for our family, we discussed aiming for a 4 year gap between children.

There were many reasons why:

• having an older child to 'help' with the baby
• 4+yrs were likely to mean less jealousy between siblings
• It was hoped the older child would be at school when the younger one came (in reality, Millie came a year before Callum started school as he is a September baby).
• less likely for sibling rivalry and fighting

and many more. I assumed the downside to the longer gap would be our children would be less likely to play together.

We were very lucky and feel blessed that mother nature (and maybe an angel or two) deemed us fit to grant us our wishes with two children born just 2 weeks short of 4 years apart.

As we hoped, the 4 year gap has proved perfect for us. The best thing is Callum is so caring with Millie. He really looks after her. If I need to pop to the kitchen to cook while they are playing in the lounge, he'll look after her. If I ask him to fetch something for her, he will. He 'reads' books to her. He talks to her so sweetly too.

However, I was wrong about Callum and Millie not playing together. Obviously, Millie at nearly 17 months doesn't fully understand playing with someone else yet but Callum will build her towers and 'help' her with her toys. Of course he often gets cross with her and doesn't want her playing with his toys on occasion but if I suggest to him he let her play with one of his power ranges, for example, while he plays with the others, he will.

I love watching how they interact with one another and taking opportunity to snap photos of them together. Which is why I couldn't wait to take part in the Siblings linky, being hosted by Lucy over at Dear Beautiful, and others who you can see on her blog. The idea is to capture a photo of your children together once a month and share it with everyone.

This is my two. I walked into the play room the other morning to see this scene - Callum was trying to help Millie with her hair clip.

I'm now looking forward to looking at everyone else's photos.

Sleep! Oh How I’ve Missed You!

It has taken 8.5 months, 2.5 months longer than her brother, but I can now confidently say (*bites lip & frantically searches for wood*) that Millie is sleeping through the night! For the past week, Millie has slept through from about 6.15-6.30 until between 6.15-7am every single night with just one stir around our bedtime for her dummy…in fact, she stirred last night then settled herself back to sleep without the dummy!

WOOOOOOHHOOOOOOOOOOOO! I FEEL HUMAN AGAIN!!!!!!

Forgive me but I feel that deserved to be shouted from the rooftops! With my search for work having begun, I was nervous about struggling to get up at the crack of dawn for work while still getting up in the night!

Strangely, it is now like my body has gone into catch up drive! Wanting to catch up on all that missed sleep from the last 9 months. I struggle to wake up and then feel exhaustingly tired around mid-afternoon! I can even go back to sleep if I wake up early – I never used to be able to do this; once I was awake, I was awake for the day.

Dreams are also on catch up. Not sure if you know this but when you don’t sleep much, you have less REM sleep (which is when we dream). Dreaming is our minds way of processing what has happened during the day and storing new things we have learnt etc. It is important for us to dream. So when we do get a good solid night of sleep, we tend to dream more to make up for the lost dream time before. So I have been dreaming lots of weird and wonderful things but nothing of interest to blog about (you really don’t want to know about how I couldn’t shake poo off my hand do you?!).

Anyway, back to Millie! Other than the sleep, not much else is new. She is eating with vigour, trying everything (EVERYTHING!!!) in site…well as far as she can bend in double & stretch to reach. Still no moving by way of roll, crawl, bum shuffle or commando crawl! Apart from the odd occasion when she rolls back to front in her cot & then complains because she is stuck! For the time being, I am enjoying being able to plonk her somewhere and for her to stay there so, although I don’t want to hinder her moving progress, I am happy for her to do it in her own time.

We have 2 teeth! Two teeny weeny but very sharp little bottom teeth! This is already making a difference with her eating. She actually uses the teeth to rip food off a bigger piece now.

            

Her babbling has a range of dadadadanananananalalalalalagagagagaga now and sometimes she sounds like she is trying to sing or have a conversation with you. So cute!

I feel she is on the verge of clapping. She loves watching what you do with your hands and occasionally brings them together but that’s as far as it goes.

She is at that age where everyone wants to talk to her! Supermarket shopping can double in time as we get stopped by every other person who wants to talk to her. I love it and feel so proud but it does make shopping to a restricted time-limit rather challenging!

Callum is lovely with her and apart from wanting to take ownership of all of Millie’s toys but not so keen to return the favour with his own, he really does love her and looks after her. I really hope (and I can see that it might) that stays with them throughout their lives as they grow up. Seeing them together I know we made the right choice of trying for a 4 year age gap.

I feel so very blessed!…and human!

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Its getting to that time of year again. Christmas! I blogged about my thoughts on Christmas over on t’other blog which is here if you want to read it.

Like the majority of children that celebrate this time of year, I loved Christmas growing up. When my siblings and I were kids the excitement started on Christmas Eves when we would have a bath and get dressed in our brand new Christmas ‘jimjams’, eat our chocolate money in front of the Christmas tree while my Mum took her annual catalogue of photos for the Christmas album.

Then we used to go to bed nice and early (had to be before midnight or Father Christmas wouldn’t come) and lay there willing ourselves to sleep so he wouldn’t pass our house by but the excitement being all too much.

On Christmas morning, it would be a competition to see which of my brother, sister or I could wake up first and whoever it was would run into the others’ bedrooms shouting “he’s been, he’s been” wielding our stockings. It used to really annoy me that I could never wake up first and my brother or sister always used to win until the year, I finally woke up first…but because my brother and sister are 7.5 and 8.5 years older than me, respectively, by this stage they were well into their teenage years and used to start the ‘cheer’ on Christmas eve and lay in as long as possible on Christmas morning. So there’s me running in to wake them up and they weren’t bothered any more and shooed me away!

Then, as we all grew up and moved away from home, Christmas lost a bit of its magic for me. Instead of sharing it with my family I chose to share it with my friends and/or my boyfriend for a few years.

But now that magic is back – now that we have our own children. Especially this year, as Callum will be 4. Christmas meant something to Callum last year, he got the excitement and Father Christmas but this year is even better because he remembers last year and knows what is about to happen again. On top of that, he has a baby sister to share it with – not that Millie will have a clue what is going on or will remember for next year.

We have already taken Callum to see Father Christmas. We took him to see him at Stewarts Garden Centre in Somerford, Christchurch, yesterday. It was the first year that Callum hasn’t been scared of him. He was a little shy but he stood there on his own in front of Father Christmas (we were about 2 ft away in the room with him) and nodded to all of his questions. He happily went to sit next to him for a photo and said “and then you’ll come to my house” as we were leaving. He voluntarily spoke to Father Christmas! This is huge! Callum was absolutely thrilled with his helicopter present too!

Aside from the bar humbugness of the Christmas shopping (which I’ve very nearly finished thankfully) and the fear of whether I am going to survive cooking Christmas dinner for 11 (6 adults, 2 older children and 3 younger children), I can’t wait for Christmas day and seeing Callum’s excited eyes once he has seen Father Christmas has been, eaten his mince pie and drunk his Baileys (yes, Baileys in this house!!) and filled his and Millie’s stocking full!

I am 4 Years Old

I am 4 Years Old!

I’m a big boy now

I am very helpful – I like to help Mummy do jobs around the house, like put the washing on, hang washing on the line and fill/empty the dishwasher. I also like to help Mummy with Millie getting her new nappy ready when Mummy is changing her or getting a muslin when Mummy has left it somewhere

I also like to make a lot of mess and spread this mess about all over the house

I now have a bike like Daddy. I still have stabilisers but I am learning and love riding it

I love my family and friends and tell them lots that I love them

I hate it when Mummy cries (when Baby Millie makes her booby hurt) and tell her that I love her and give her a cuddle

I have lots and lots of energy

I like to got outside to play, I like to go places and see people, I like shopping but particularly like eating out. In fact every time we go past a restaurant, cafe, supermarket I get hungry all of a sudden, but Mummy & Daddy keep telling me its a treat to eat out and costs money so we don’t go often

I am always hungry

I can now count to 13 on my own but sometime like to invent numbers like eleventeen. I can also recognise bigger numbers when I see them. I like to count and look for numbers a lot

At night I like to cuddle my doggy called Suzie and my teddy called…er….Teddy!

My favourite meal is probably Sausages and Chips

I like to say everything is my ‘favourite one’ even if I haven’t tried it or don’t know what it is – I also ‘love’ everything too

Since becoming 4, I now like cauliflower, red & orange pepper and mushrooms

I still wear a pull up at night, but hey, that’s ok

I like to go to sleep with the light on. My Auntie LaLa bought me a rocket lava lamp for my birthday so I go to sleep with this light on and Mummy & Daddy turn it off once I’m asleep.

I get up and make my own breakfast in the morning before Mummy and Daddy wake up. Though Mummy turns the toaster off now so I don’t burn the house down, despite bringing her toast in bed once!

I like to watch Dora the Explorer and would watch it non-stop if Mummy let me but she says I can only watch 2 episodes a day

The real reason I go downstairs when I get up is so I can sneak a few more extra episodes of Dora in without Mummy knowing how many I’m watching!

I can dress myself and clean my own teeth but sometimes I pretend I can’t. I’ve been doing this for a year or two but sometimes ‘forget’ and try to get Mummy or Daddy to do it

I like swimming. I’m very brave and jump in without any fear. I also prefer to swim with my face in the water. I can’t swim without arm bands as I’m still learning to kick my legs correctly but I’m getting there.

I love going to Nursery and go twice a week, on Thursday and Friday

I’m so big now that I can’t reach from my feet to my head with my hands

When I get bigger and I’m a girl, I’m going to help Mummy feed Millie with my boobies

I Am Six Weeks Old

I am now six weeks old!

I have been smiling for 3 weeks and smile at my family when they talk to me. I have also been known to smile at Mummy’s boob and the connector that holds my mobile attached to my cot!

I  like to stick out my tongue

I blow bubbles a lot (though not intentionally)

I made my Mummy sad when I started crying real tears

I make my Mummy very happy when I try to talk to her. At the moment it just comes out as “ohhhhh” and then gives me hiccups which I don’t like

I still sleep more than I am awake but I am much more interactive now when I’m awake and the periods I am awake are starting to get longer – but who doesn’t like to sleep all day?

I have lots of Cradle Cap all over the front of my head, forehead, eyebrows and on and behind my ears. I find it itchy so when I get cuddled I rub my head on people to make it stop itching (Mummy wants to know who invented such a silly word and challenges everyone who says they are not tempted to say a naughty word instead of cap)

My forehead appears to have grown quicker than my scalp/hair – I therefore now look bald at the front of my head. I also have a bald patch at the back.

My hair is getting fairer each day & Mummy suspects I’ll be blonde like my Daddy & Brother but swears she will dye it brown like hers & no one will know!

I have only had a few baths – I preferred the one in the sink to the ones in the big bath but I’m not a huge fan of this water thing!

I usually sleep for a 6-7 hour stretch at night which my Mummy said my brother didn’t do for several months – this makes me smile smugly at my big brother when Mummy isn’t looking

I can already swing my hips over when I see something I like – Mummy thinks I’ll be rolling before they know it. He he, watch out Callum’s toys, soon you’ll be mine!

Stepping Up to His New Role of Big Brother

It is natural for any mum to worry about how their first child(ren) will adapt to a new sibling. Its not just your life that changes, their life will change beyond all recognition, life wont only be just about them now there will be a new attention stealer in town! It was one of the reasons we wanted to wait until Callum was 4 before introducing a new family member. At 4 a sibling is less likely to get jealous and they can understand more, help and get involved.

I was still expecting some kind of rebellion, and I still am. I feel myself saying “no because of Millie” in relation to a number of different scenarios and so I feel its only a matter of time when Callum has enough of this noisy, dull infiltrator taking up so much of his Mummy’s time!

There was a time in the first week Callum was being whingey and clingy to Stuart and I was worried but he was feeling under the weather so I can put it down to that.

Mostly, so far, he has just taken it all in his stride and is adapting wonderfully. Not only is he accepting of his new little sister, he has taken on the ‘Big Boy’ mantle. He is becoming more and more independent, wanting to do little tasks on his own. He is cleaning his own teeth, feeding himself, often getting his own breakfast, being helpful to me around the house such as helping me with the dishwasher and fetching dirty washing for me. He is being a little star and his reward chart is rapidly filling up – we had best start thinking of a reward as it wont be long before he gets to a full sheet at this rate.

These are all things we were struggling with getting him to do up until really recently so it is a real relief that he is keen to please at the moment. I say at the moment as these things often go in phases and he occasionally drops back to being a monkey after a exceptionally good spell so I’m sure there will be a moment in the future when he is testing my patience again but right now, when I really need him to be, he is being the best Big Brother and Son I could ask for.