Wednesday, 26 October 2011

Encouraging Independence

I posted a while back in April, State of Independence, about how independent Callum is – or maybe how lazy his parents are!

I read an interesting article in The Independent recently, written by a fellow blogger, Katie Gunn called ‘The Lazy Mother’s Guide to Parenting’. Not only was it good to know I wasn’t alone but it was also good to hear that, actually, I am probably doing Callum a favour.

It made me take another look at Callum’s ‘independence’ and I felt an update post was in order.
We all like to eke out that time in the morning when your child is up and you want just an extra 1 or 2 minutes (or hours) in bed. Well, we’re no different!

So, when Callum comes in to our room of a morning wanting breakfast, we try to convince him to play in his room for just 5 more minutes…Callum, not content with this thought has often gone downstairs and helped himself to cereal, pouring it in a bowl. Thankfully, he tends to then leave out the milk but there have been occasions where he hasn’t and there has been a large puddle of milk on the floor – he hasn’t quite worked out control while pouring yet.

He even started to make himself a cheese sandwich once (I may have told you that already) – it was when Stuart had to work from home as Callum was poorly then had a miracle turn around following the wonder of Calpol! While Stuart was caught up with work, we think Callum may have got bored (and too hungry) to wait for him to finish what he was doing.

I may have, on more than one occasion, gone along with his wish to wear wellies when it is bright sunshine outside because it means he can get them on himself without my help. In fairness, he has Velcro fastening trainers now, which he can also do himself, so all good!

I have often gone out with Callum looking like I dressed him in the dark, because he has chosen his own clothes and, of course, I want to ‘encourage him’ to make his own decisions…! Sometimes, I can’t blame Callum for his poor fashion sense as I have chosen the clothes but I don’t tell anyone else that of course!

I have started to let him go into the men’s toilet on his own when there is a wait for the ladies’. It makes perfect sense to me, we can either stand in a queue until its too late and there is a puddle on the floor, or he can go in to the men’s toilets on his own – he insists on going in a cubicle on his own anyway. I now just look like a weirdo hanging around outside men’s toilets trying to sneak a look in every time the door opens…that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!Winking smile.

Callum is still at that age where he is happy to do jobs for you and help. Like, get you a piece of kitchen towel or something from the fridge say, like, erm, a can of beer for Daddy maybe (ahem!). And we’d never dream of exploiting him for his willingness to help, nope, not us! We may finish a sandwich and put the plate down on the floor intending to take it out when we next go. Callum will see it, pick it up and take it out for us – and then follows a crash as it is thrown into the sink, but hey, its saved us a trip…and washing up too, if the said item hasn’t survived the sink throw!

The following is slightly less focused on laziness but more in wonder at what else Callum can do on his own or what he tries to do…
  • He can now stand up to wee like a big boy.
  • He has actually done the washing up a couple of times!! Admittedly, I did have to rewash most of it but he didn’t do too bad a job.
  • He takes the washing up for me and puts the clothes away – I then have the funny task of trying to locate the clothes later. He usually separates his clothes from ours and puts his own clothes away correctly (or near enough) but he hasn’t quite mastered Stuart and my clothes yet. The other day I opened a drawer and found all of our clothes in the one drawer. At least he tries – you’ve got to reward him for that.
  • He helps me put food shopping away – and again, often does a pretty good job! No incidents of finding items in strange places yet, which is probably better than I could say for myself, especially when I was pregnant! (tea bags in the fridge and milk in the cupboard!)
  • He has been able to wash himself and clean his teeth himself for a while – probably not unusual for his age.
  • He feeds Lotté (the cat)
  • I’ve mentioned before that he helps me cook all the time, even cutting vegetables.
  • He helps me sort dirty laundry and likes to help me add tablets/softener to the washing machine.
  • He sweeps and mops the kitchen floor
(ok, maybe some of those still are focussed on lazy parenting…!)

This post isn’t meant to be one of those “look what my kid can do” as in a smug mother who thinks their child is better than everyone else’s – its actually meant to be just in wonder, as a mother, of what my child can do…as in comparison to what my husband can do, say…

Monday, 24 October 2011

A Pick of the Cherries

Stuart (my husband) and I enjoy football though don’t go along to lots of matches, in fact we can both count on one hand the number of times we’ve been to a league game – one of which was at AFC Bournemouth but pre-Callum. That said, having recently moved to Bournemouth, Stuart has adopted them as his chosen team and I have been keeping an interest (not wanting to completely give up the batten for Southampton FC).

We did attempt to take Callum to a local football match where we used to live, about a year ago. Unfortunately, he was clearly too young and unwilling to sit still long enough to watch a whole 90 minutes so we soon found ourselves playing tag team to walk up and down pitch-side trying trying to keep him entertained.

When I was presented with the opportunity to attend AFC Bournemouth for their Family Football Festival and to watch them play against Bury to review it on behalf of Netmums, I jumped at the chance hoping that Callum was now of an age that his attention span may just about stretch to the final whistle, helped along by all the excitement and distractions that a Family Football Festival may bring. The idea behind the Festival is to introduce new families to live football to show that it can be an enjoyable event for the whole family and similar events are taking place at 39 other npower football league matches across the country in October and November – find out more about it on their Facebook page. This seemed like the perfect time to reintroduce Callum to football in the hope that, should it be a success, we could go to more football matches in the future – and maybe, next time, I’d get to see Southampton play.

The fun opened at Seward Stadium at 12noon with a 3pm kick off.  We got there early (too early) so took the opportunity to check out the club shop to purchase a Cherries scarf for Callum and then headed to the Legends bar for a spot of lunch.

Initially, I was a little disappointed at the number of activities/stalls on offer as I had expected something maybe a bit more spectacular but, actually, it was probably about right for the crowd. There were a couple of charity stalls selling raffle tickets and a spot the ball competition, a balloon modeller (is that what they’re called?), a surfboard ride (you know the ones – where they gradually increase the speed until you fall off in a mass of arms and legs, bucking bronco style), a game where you can see how fast you can kick a football, an inflatable/bouncy obstacle course thing, singing from the Funky Little Choir Company and a face-painter.

Callum’s earlier grumpy mood faded into history as his eyes lit up and wanted to try it all. We steered him away from the kicking a football game – I am sure they would have let him have a go but there was already a small queue of older boys trying out their skills so thought it would be better to lead Callum to a more 3 year old appropriate activity. That also meant bypassing the surf board but Callum was easily persuaded away when he saw the inflatable assault course - he kicked off his shoes immediately and the next we saw of him was him disappearing in a jump down the other side of the slide at the other end.

After a few runs we took him to get his face painted. The woman doing the face painting was very good and offered a wide selection of choices displayed on a catalogue of photos ranging from monsters to princesses to team themed faces which is what Callum chose with absolutely no influence from us of course…ahem (see photos). There were meant to be 2 face painters apparently but the second person couldn’t make it (due to illness) which was a shame as she was very busy making every face a work of art, which did mean quite a wait in between each face. She was worth waiting for, however, as she was very good.

Next stop was to get a balloon hat! The balloon modeller was brilliant, making balloon staffs and hats in a multitude of designs and colours - I even saw a monkey & banana hat and a fish caught on a fishing rod. We got a cool, very tall hat for Callum in the team colours which meant we were less likely to lose him in the crowd, mainly because I was running inches behind him apologising to all the adults he kept taking out with the top of his hat.

Fans (both children and adults) had been encouraged to come in fancy dress with a prize for the winner. Knowing Callum wouldn’t last 5 minutes in any fancy dress outfit, we ducked out of this one but Callum took a shine to a poor woman dressed as Elmo who kindly posed for a photo. Cherry Bear, the Club’s mascot was also present wondering around the stalls waving to young fans and posing for photos but Callum wasn’t so convinced.

Once inside the stadium, we were seated in the Family Stand. It was lovely to see so many families and such a mix of men, women, boys and girls in attendance filling up the stand. There were signs requesting supporters watch their language while in the family stand with a text number if someone was upset by language of another fan. This really gave the impression that the stadium values families. Everyone was impeccably behaved and created a pleasant environment for children. Although, there was one comical moment when a father hurriedly covered the mouth of his young son as he started to call out “The Ref’s a …” (allowing other adult supporters to fill in the blank with a word of their choice).

Callum was quite fidgety at the start of the game but, with the help of a clementine in the first half, a hot dog at half time and an apple in the second half (the apples are given out free for under 16s by the club), he made it through the game and I think quite enjoyed it – although disappointed at the end that he didn’t get to actually play ‘kickball’ himself. I would recommend taking lots of food/snacks/drinks with you if you are planning to take a 3 year old to the football to keep them occupied but would take your own as I did think the food available at the stands inside the ground, was a little on the pricey side.

Overall, it was an enjoyable day, only being let down by Bournemouth being beaten 2-1 by Bury. I would definitely take Callum back to the club for another match (armed with lots of food). I’m  a little envious, reading other people’s reviews of the Family Football Festivals that took place at other clubs as there were no tours, half-time entertainment, mascot races etc for us but AFC Bournemouth is only a little club and Callum had a great time which is what is important.


  • Reserved, free parking space in front of the stadium (thank you)
  • Elmo (for Callum)
  • Balloon modeller
  • Face painter


  • Price of food/drink in the ground
  • Not getting to meet any footballers (but that’s just me Smile with tongue out)
  • Bournemouth losing 2-1

A few photos of our day:

I am a member of the Netmums Parent Bloggers Network, a unique community of parent bloggers from around the UK who have been handpicked by the Netmums team from our database to review products and brands on their behalf. I am paid an expenses fee to cover my time but Netmums have no editorial control whatsoever about what I blog about. Being a member of the Netmums Blogging Network means that I can 'opt in' to try out products and brands and get my expenses covered but that I retain full editorial integrity.

Friday, 21 October 2011

Gush, gush, oh my, I’d just like to thank

I am very flattered to have received the award of “Versatile Blogger” from two fellow bloggers, Sian at Pie and Bear and Aimee at The Perfect-Bad Mummy. To receive the awards from these lovely ladies is truly flattering as they both have such brilliant and unique blogs themselves.

It still amazes me that anyone reads what I write (I’m still not entirely convinced they do) but this helps fuel my fantasy, so I am delighted to accept it as true.

So, having received this award, I must now follow some protocol by completing the following 3 steps:

1. Thank the blogger who has awarded me and link back to them

Big, HUGE, thanks to the lovely Sian & Aimee and again I share with you their blogs:

Sian = Pie and Bear A personal, yet light-hearted account of reaching parenting milestones. Just so damn gorgeous in looks and nature and produces stunning children – I just wish I could hate her but I can’t she is just too lovely!

Aimee = The Perfect-Bad Mummy Hilarious parenting blog that says out loud what we are all thinking. With her writing, she makes me feel I’m not alone in the daily motherhood battles as I read about events all too familiar which teaches me to see the funnier side of life as we now know it!

2. Share 7 things about myself

OK, so now the tough bit…if you read my blog, you probably already know a fair bit about me but I’ll try to think of something new:

  1. I got married to my lovely husband, Stuart, in 2006 to 30 friends and family in the lovely country of Cyprus. It was everything I dreamed it would be and would recommend it to everyone and anyone.
  2. I love singing...but before you start pleading me for my cd and expecting to see me as the next winner of XFactor…I cannot sing for toffee…though would give it a good go for a Lindor chocolate (that said, I’d give anything a go for a Lindor!). I sing all the time, in shops, in front of strangers (just loudly to myself mind, not as a performance), not to mention of course the shower and in the car (in competition with Callum) etc and I LOVE singstar!
  3. I have 3 tattoos,a fairy on my butt, a heart and swirly pattern on my lower back and a swirly pattern with butterfly on my foot. The latter being my first mother’s day present from Callum – does that go down in history as the most weirdest first mother’s day present ever?
  4. Bad Party Trick No.1: I can down a pint in about 6 seconds and was taught how to do so by a boy I used to go to school and work with but instead of beer, at the time, it was pina colada. I say ‘at the time’ not that it morphed into something else over the years (which of course it did) but because I have changed the beverage to beer following the lesson learnt at that time.
  5. Bad Party Trick No.2: I am really rather good at the ‘Cereal Box’ game. If you are not familiar with the game, you take a cereal box and attempt to pick up the box using only your mouth without any other part of your body touching the floor (or any furniture) apart from your feet. Once everyone in the group has achieved it, you tear off a layer, and so the game continues until you are down to a flat piece of box. If you fall over or touch the floor with another part of your body you get another 2 tries before you are out, unless you give up. The game is usually only suggested (and usually by me) after consuming far too many vinos and still, nine times out of ten, I get down to the flat piece of cardboard.
  6. I like football (playing and watching), climbing, horse-riding, drawing, writing poetry (both the last two I tend to do better at while drunk), body-boarding and more – alas, I don’t actually do any of them anymore as I have a child!
  7. My favourite flower is a bright pink gerbera – which was also the main flower used in my wedding bouquet…just in case you were thinking of buying me any..? No? Oh, ok then.

3. Pass the award(s) along to other newly discovered blogs

This is me, Fluff and all – by, er, me! Oh, is it not cool to plug yourself, is that not the deal…oh alright then.

Hopes Dreams and Morning Sickness – by Kay. She is new to blogging but is inviting you to share with her, her pregnancy journey for her second child.

Easy Meal Planner – by Alison, a true foodie. She offers reviews and experiences as she tests food and drink recipes and she’ll even plan a menu for you right down to the shopping list.

Just the two (other than me) for the moment as I have started following a couple of other new ones recently but access them through Twitter and haven’t yet saved their urls. Will update at a later date.

Saturday, 15 October 2011

Nursery Update & Another Funny

Firstly, nursery!

So, today is Friday, when he goes to nursery for the whole day.

We get up this morning and I say about going to nursery. The conversation goes like this:

Callum: “No, I don’t like it”
Me:  “You said you enjoyed yourself on Monday and when I asked if you wanted to go back Friday, you said yes – today is Friday”
Callum: “no, I want to go in the car”
Me: “What the car to nursery?”
Callum: “Noooooooo not nursery the car”
Me: “We can’t go to nursery in the car, its walking distance, we walk to nursery”

Anyway, we kind of leave it there and get ready to leave. He tries to suggest that we are going to the green man, as this is in the opposite direction to nursery but no, we don’t need to cross the green man to go to nursery.

Eventually, he seems to accept it. We have a little game of ‘running to nursery’ – odd child likes running with me.

We get to nursery and put his slippers on then he virtually pushes me out of the door. I thought we had a few more years yet before he got embarrassed of me dropping him at the school gates! There he is pushing me and saying bye and goes into breakfast. Fair enough! Guess he is settled now then!


So now for the funny thing…

Callum decides the other day he needs a tissue so goes off to get one. He comes back saying “tissue gone”. Remembering the kitchen roll was empty I tell him I know, I need to get a new one down (off the cupboard where its kept). He disappears again so I assume he has gone to the downstairs loo instead and think no more of it. Then Stuart and I hear “I’ve found it”. Stuart goes to see what he’s found and I hear Stuart laughing from the kitchen and saying “not quite right Callum but well done”…I go out to see what’s up…see for yourself, you’ve gotta love him!



Wednesday, 12 October 2011

Funny Little Man

Just a quick post to log a few things that Callum has said/done recently that have made me giggle…

  1. A little while ago now but Callum and I were at my mum’s (Nana's) enjoying the back garden and I was sitting with Callum on my lap. The topic of conversation turned to hair cuts. I said to Callum “We should get Nana to cut your hair, go and get a bowl and Nana will cut it for you” making reference to bowl hair cuts of my youth (luckily not me but there were many a terrible style at the hands of my mum – the nickname ‘sideburns’ may have been adopted for me at some point and my fringe may have started from my crown for a while!!!). The conversation moved on and we thought no more of it and I hardly noticed when Callum jumped off my lap. The next thing Callum walks out with a bowl in his hands. Mum and I are asking if he wants something to eat trying to work out why he is holding the bowl and he is now looking rather confused and tugging at and saying “hair” when it dawns on me – he has got a bowl so Nana can cut his hair! He he!
  2. When Stuart was in the bathroom shaving the other day Callum said something to him which Stuart misheard.

    Stuart: “Daddy is pretty?”
    Callum: “No Daddy isn’t pretty, Mummy is pretty”
  3. Callum has had a couple of bumps recently – one was falling off his bed (while jumping on it) and hitting his mouth on his toy box and putting his tooth through his lip. The other was less of a bump but he cut his finger with a knife when cutting vegetables with me. In both cases I have asked him to hold tissue pressed against it. The other day he disappeared for a couple of minutes and just when I was thinking he must be up to no good he came in clutching a wad of toilet tissue against his chin saying it was poorly. Now I hadn’t heard a bump, a yelp, crash, cry etc so was a little sceptical. He asked me to hold it but wouldn’t let me look underneath. Eventually he said it was ok now so when I took off the tissue, sure enough, it was absolutely fine. Strange monkey!
  4. While getting changed after swimming the other day, Callum roared so I said “are you a lion?”, Callum said “lion” pointed to my lady bits and then roared again. I promptly booked in a wax and have now ‘tamed my lion’!!!!! Surprised smile
  5. Callum loves singing very very loudly and equally as badly in the car. He doesn’t really hear or know the words to the songs so he either makes up his own or just goes “aaaahhhhh” usually. He often tells me off for singing when I sing along to the words as “no mummy, mine ding” (in other words he wants me to stop singing because he wants a turn). I keep telling him we can both sing together but he isn’t having an of it! This, alone, makes me giggle but today he was singing along to Matt Cardle’s new song “Run for your liiiiiiiiiiiife” but was instead singing “No more caaaaaaaaaaars” Laughing out loud

    No idea why, I think that’s what he actually thought the words were and he even congratulated himself when the song finished!

I will try to update with any new ones that occur – I’m looking forward to the funny stuff he will start to come out with now he is getting better at speaking. Though I imagine I’ll be regretting that when he starts to announce embarrassing or unpleasant things loudly in supermarkets while pointing at strangers. I’ve heard the stories from others so I am sure my turn will come.

Monday, 10 October 2011

Insecurities and Emotional Battles

Callum is having a bit of a hard time settling in to nursery. As is common, he plays when he is there but he really doesn’t want to go.

This morning was particularly tough. We started walking and talking about nursery and he said “I don’t want to go, I don’t like it” but I said he would have fun and play with lots of friends etc. Then when we got to the road that leads to his nursery road he stopped and wouldn’t go up it. He was saying “No, I want to go that way” wanting to continue on the road we were on. I had to pick him up and carry him there. He cuddled into me and made little whinnying noises. I took him in to breakfast and he held on tight to my hand not wanting me to go. I’m pretty sure as soon as I left the room he was better – one of the nursery carers sat next to him and started talking to him about his monkey (a stuffed toy monkey he took with him not anything weird!!!)

I start talking about nursery the day before he goes so he can prepare himself and on the morning I keep saying how long he’ll go for and when I will be there to pick him up. I’m trying to have something nice for him when I pick him up – either a little present or treat of some sort. On days (like today) when he is only there for half a day I ask him what he wants to do in the afternoon and we do something fun.

I am pretty sure its because he is only there 1.5 days – I remember when he was going to his previous nursery in Godalming for 1 day a week he never really settled until he went there full time. However, we can’t afford to send him there full time at the moment while I’m out of work. The days are split with the half day on Monday and the full day on Friday so I might ask to see if we can move the half day to be next to the full day.

The reason I am finding it so hard, despite my logical brain telling me as soon as I leave and the door closes behind me, he is happy as a sandboy and will be just fine, is because my emotional brain remembers when I was a 7/8 year old child. I wont go into detail but I was bullied by my cousin. My family used to be really close and pretty much every Friday was spent at my aunt & uncles (or so it felt to the younger me). My parents would stay there late and they would put me to bed there either on one of my cousin’s bedroom floor on a temporary bed or on the sofa in the lounge. What they didn’t know was my cousin was bullying me and so when I used to beg and plead that they didn’t leave me there when they left (to pick me up in the morning not because they didn’t want me any more I hastened to add!!), I really did mean it, I was petrified of waking up the next day in the same house. Often when I was asked if I ‘wanted’ to stay, my cousin used to hide around the corner and make me say yes when I soooooo didn’t want to. Anyway, like I said, that’s a different story and not one I’m going to go into but I said to myself as I grew up, I would listen to my child if s/he pleaded with me not to leave him/her somewhere. My parents trusted my cousin and they had no reason to fear something untoward was going on and just thought I was being silly and were sure I was having lots of fun. How were they to know?

Anyway, I picked up Callum after lunch today and I always take the chance when I first arrive to spy on him and, sure enough, he was happily playing. He gave me a big hug and then didn’t stop rabbiting to me. I asked him if he enjoyed nursery today and had fun to which he said a believable yes. I asked him if he wanted to go back to nursery on Friday and, once again, he said yes. So this has helped and reassured me that the morning faffing is just a little bit of insecurity and, naturally ;o), he’d just rather his Mummy got to enjoy his day at nursery with him!

Sunday, 9 October 2011

Monkeying Around

Today we went to Monkey World near Wareham with a couple of friends and their 2.5 year old son.

We all had a lovely day and there was no risk of mistaking the boys for monkeys – the monkeys were the ones behind the bars silly!


But seriously, they were really well behaved and played lovely together. Callum was so excited about seeing the monkeys and playing with Tristan, asking “Where’s Tristan” every 10 seconds for the whole journey there and having to explain each time, he was still in the car in front of us.

So, obviously, we saw lots of monkeys and some up close. My personal favourites are the marmosets – so cute and small.


Around all the cages they had plaques up introducing the monkeys along with how they came to be at Monkey World – so sad to hear how they have been treated before.

It was a little expensive to get in - £11 per adult and £7.75 for Callum (charges started at 3 years old for children) but, if we had planned better, I imagine there was probably some kind of discount voucher out there and you could clearly see where the money had gone inside. It was very clean with lots of well made playground activities for the children and there were lots of covered enclosures with Perspex/glass separating you from the monkeys often allowing you to get quite close to the monkeys or see clearly without bars restricting your view. Callum was a little scared of the big cheeky chimpanzees that were banging against the glass and asking the public for kisses from the other side of the pane.


There were regular talks from the keepers throughout the day at different enclosures which we didn’t get to hear – we were there from about 11 until about 2.30 and could probably have spent longer there but I wasn’t too disappointed as I’d be happy to go back there (as I am sure Callum would love to) and this way it means we haven’t already exhausted the place – and next time I hope not to miss out the Stump-Tailed Macaques like we did this time.

Can’t believe I’m actually saying I want to go back as I’m not normally a fan of monkeys – far too intelligent and naughty because of it for my liking. Bloody typical that I was born in to the Monkey Chinese birth sign!

Tuesday, 4 October 2011

More to Me Than Mummy?

Recently, I've been feeling a bit brighter about life.

I've been 'coping' with being a Stay At Home Mum ("SAHM") helped by keeping my days busy. This week for example:

Monday - am: Callum is in nursery and went for a run (3.7miles this week!) then I cleaned (never enough time to do a whole house in 2 hours so half always remains unclean!!) before picking Callum up after lunch; pm: got the bus into Bournemouth for shopping and a play on the beach, walking back along the sea front in time for dinner

Tuesday - am: swimming; pm: wonder around Burley (small New Forrest village) then a couple of mop up cleaning jobs

Wednesday – Mum is over all day so will do a couple of mop up cleaning jobs, receive delivery of food shopping then head into town for a mooch. Hopefully, will squeeze in a run when mum arrives.

Thursday – Babysitting (well, he is a 12 year old boy, hardly a baby!!!) for my sister and getting an ooochy ouchy wax (say no more!)

Friday – Callum’s first full (after last week’s never happened) day at nursery when I will be putting my head down to study after a quick mum’s meet with some Twitter peops.

Writing it all down like that, there seems very little in there for Callum but we do something for him each day. Admittedly, more often it is the beach (its still a novelty) but sometimes it’ll  be the park, he enjoys playing with my niece, the visit to Burley today was for him so we could see some New Forest ponies. OK, so the ponies didn’t want to be seen today but we did see a couple of donkeys about 200 meters away. And, of course, the swimming this morning was for him – though I do enjoy it too.

But even keeping busy, and even though it sounds like I’m doing a lot for me, I still struggle mentally once in a while. Like today! I did enjoy swimming but then after swimming I just,well,couldn’t be bothered. I felt like saying “I’m booooorrreeeed” like I did as a grumpy teenager in the school summer holidays. I didn’t want to return home as I would have to clean and that was like my mum saying “well tidy your room if your bored”! But I didn’t want to do anything either. I’m spoilt, I live in a wonderful place but today I felt like I’d already exhausted a lot of it. I haven’t – there is so much I haven’t done or seen – but they are still the same ‘kind of things’ even if they are in different places. I’m feeling my rut closing in on me. I’m losing the will to want to look for work but am quietly panicking inside that this is it for the rest of my life and I wont be able to get back to doing the work I enjoy, have been building my experience up for, am becoming more qualified to do.

This ‘job in the pipeline’ is still there but I am waiting! Waiting for someone else to shout jump and I’m not good at waiting. Once someone has an idea, I like to take action immediately otherwise I start to get the fear that it’ll never happen…and often never does. I hate procrastinating.

But today, I am sure, is just a blip…tomorrow, next week, soon…I will be back fighting again, spurred on by a glimpse of a different future on a different day. There must be more to me than just being ‘Mummy’. Its probably just alcohol withdrawals – I had the wise (read crazy) idea to only drink alcohol at the weekend. Roll on Friday!