1 year, 1 month, 3 weeks, 6 days

I am finding this age quite hard at the moment. Life looking after Callum has gone back to being relentless! No where near as hard as the first 6 months but constant nonetheless. I feel bad complaining because I know what I'm going through is nothing special and everyone else can cope just fine without complaining, not to mention those that have more than one child, but I'm fed up of my bum skimming the seat as I nearly sit down and constantly saying "no" calling "Callum" and "don't do...". It is fine, of course, when I sit down and play with Callum one to one but it is when I need to get on and do other stuff I get frustrated. I do play with Callum quite a bit but there are times I do need to do other things while he is awake - especially if he hasn't had his full nap (around 2 hours).

If I am on the laptop, he is trying to press all the buttons (usually the backspace, enter or delete buttons) or is trying pull or push the screen. He is still always trying to push the buttons on the sky box, video/dvd player, ps3 Wii and TV. Thankfully, he is less interested in the CVs and DVDs now but does still go to play with them occasionally. If I leave the lounge door open to the kitchen he often makes a mad dash to play with the squash bottles on the bottom shelf of our cupboard (the door has fallen off at the moment), play with the recycling, play with the washing machine.

I am trying to go out more to keep him entertained. He has moved his nap from 10.30am to be 11.30-12 so it means we can now do something in the morning or afternoon (or both). I've been to a couple of toddler/play groups and another type of soft play centre.

To be honest, I haven't been that keen on the toddler groups. I can completely understand people's need to go and why they find the support there invaluable but this is sort of my problem with them. The people that go there are either those that need the support or those that really want to help those that need the support. The main reason I am going is to entertain Callum. I don't seem to fit in either of the above camps and am therefore not meeting like-minded people to me. As I just said, the reason I am going is for Callum so it isn't a problem if I don't get to meet/talk to people or make friends, as long as Callum enjoys himself. But I would rather find somewhere where I felt relaxed and comfortable.

The soft play place was brilliant though. Pain to get to in the morning as the session starts at 9am and goes through a major traffic hot spot but it was worth it. I'll definite go again and they do have later sessions and sessions on a different day too so if traffic continues to be a problem then I can try a different one. Callum, more importantly, loved it too. Spent most of his time either in the Ball Pool or on the bouncy castle.

Development wise, there are a few things to update on.

Don't think I've mentioned this in previous posts but Callum is very able to go up and down stairs now (though I still make sure I am below him on the stairs just in case). He also knows when a step down is too high for him he needs to go down backwards. I really thought this would take a while to teach in the beginning but he seemed to learn it quite quickly. He still goes forwards down the single steps that go to the garden or out the front door but otherwise he turns round first.

This past week we have been teaching him to stand on his own. Yesterday, he kept crawling up to me, standing himself up and then letting go himself. I think the longest stand so far has been about 10 seconds. He has tried a couple of times to stand up himself from crawling. He pushes his knees up so he is on his feet and hands but then can't work out what to do next. Don't think it will be long until he works it out.

Although Callum doesn't say many really recognisable words that other people will understand, he is starting to say things that we recognise. He says "don't" and "ta" (for thank you) now but I also think he tries to say a few other things too (typically can't remember any of them). He tries to say "no poo" when we change his nappy first thing in the morning. I am trying to get him to say "drink" at the moment and I am going to try to get him to say "please" too. Oh and he tries to say "oh dear" too.

Callum can also blow now. He sometimes blows his food to cool it down but typically he doesn't do it when it actually needs it!

He really loves books now. He will often bring me one for him to read or he will point at one.

So, although this stage is tiring, it is still really exciting to see what new thing he is going to do next and to watch the learning process as he accomplishes a new skill.

Looks like I might have a job for 2 days a week for the next 3-6 months. It isn't doing what I want to do, it is an admin type job but it will hopefully pay for me to put Callum in childcare for 3 days with the aim that I will work on setting up my own business on the third day. It is just impossible to concentrate on it when Callum is around. After the second childminder I had lined up informed me that she is giving up childminding, we are now looking at nurseries. We think Callum could benefit, now, from observing and learning from children that are a little further advanced than he is as well as the social aspects of being in a nursery.

I went to see one today. It didn't jump out at me as being a wonderful nursery but then I haven't really got anything to compare it to at this stage. Unfortunately, they have only some days available between now and Christmas then they are full from January so, unless a place becomes available, I would have to move Callum anyway. I'm seeing another one next Monday and I might look at a couple in the town I am going to be working in too.

I am starting to look forward to Christmas with Callum. Last year he was too young to enjoy everything but I'm hoping he will be able to take a bit more in this year - though I can see me stressing about him touching the tree or presents underneath. I am so determined to teach Callum 'no' rather than removing everything I don't want him to touch but wonder whether I have the patience to stop Callum from pulling everything off the tree and opening all the presents we put underneath. We shall see - got a month or so before I need stress over that.

1 year, 1 month, 1 weeks, 2 days

Callum is doing well. Still asserting his authority and independence! But making me laugh and smile on a regular basis too.

His speech is still developing, though I'm a bit concerned that his main 'word' at the moment is "don't" while wagging his finger at me. He does things on purpose that he knows he shouldn't do so when I call his name or say "No" he does the finger wagging saying "don't". I've also taught him to blow kisses :o). He also recognises a dog when he sees one and makes a woof sound (to be honest, it doesn't sound much like a dog and is very similar to his monkey but without the action! But I know it is dog!).

He is really getting into books now. He will bring one to me to read. He particularly likes one he got from Grandma called the Ten Little Chicks. He asks for it all the time. It has a great pop up page at the end. We often read it just before bedtime while he drinks his milk. Talking of bedtime "GO TO SLEEP CALLUM" - he is meant to be napping but I think he is pushing his naptime back. So rather than napping, I can hear him crying out and hitting the side of his cot with his legs. Will try to put him down a bit later tomorrow to see how that goes. Bit of a pain for lunch though....do I give it before his nap or wait until he wakes up???

Not much else to report on Callum.

I'm still trying to find work/set up my own business. Need to focus on the business and start making progress.

Really starting to miss being an independent woman and a person in my own right, not just a mum. Went out for alumni drinks with my old department last night and it was so nice just being me. Conversation still often turned to babies as so many of the people I worked with have now had 1 or 2 babies or are currently pregnant so it was quite an obvious topic of conversation. However, it took me back to a time when I was Debbie and not just Mum (I say 'just mum' and I am by no means downplaying the worth of a mum - I am just (there's that word again) trying to say I feel more like a mum and nothing else when I feel that there should be more to me). Makes me even hungrier to get back to working. I love Callum to pieces but definitely feel like I'm ready to have more in my life now. That's more in my life not relating to children, not more children in my life! Clearing that up before people start getting funny ideas.

On the other side of things, I took a big step to saying goodbye to my old self yesterday. I know, confusing! One minute I say I want to feel like my old self and then I'm saying goodbye to my old self. I mean the skinny (slimmer at least) me! I packed up all the clothes that are 2 sizes too small, don't suit my current body shape (i.e. tops that are too short and show of midriff now but didn't used to) and clothes that were past their sell-by date! Quite depressing and didn't leave me with much at all! However, on the positive side, I did find that I still fit into one skirt and a few pairs of trousers. That's more than I thought I would fit into! Now hoping Christmas presents come in the way of money/vouchers and I can hit the sales to fill the wardrobe up again! Assuming I've been a good girl and Father Christmas thinks I deserve presents, of course.

1 Year, 2 weeks, 1 day

Well, along with turning 1, came tantrums. They seemed to have eased off a bit this week but last week he was a nightmare. In a way, they are quite funny. If he is sitting, he sort of folds himself in half putting his face in between his legs with his nose touching the floor - wonder if he'll still be able to do that when he is older????

The reasons for his tantrums, though, were probably because he was under the weather. Along with teething (which seems to be continuously cycling through various teething symptoms) he appeared to have a sore throat and sniffles. Every time he coughed, he cried out. He was sick a couple of times too in the evening and went completely off his food. Couldn't get him to eat more than about a mouthful of food for about 3 days. Although you know you don't need to worry, everyone tells you that this is normal when they feel ill - babies/toddlers often go completely off their food and prefer to drink more milk - I've even told others this when they have worried! But, when it does happen, you can't stop yourself from worrying. I just kept thinking, he didn't eat anything for breakfast or lunch, he must be hungry by dinner time!!! He first started showing signs of being unwell on the Saturday and his eating was sporadic. Then he hardly ate anything for Monday and Tuesday. By Wednesday, I decided to try the fail proof macaroni cheese that never gets refused and, sure enough, he managed to eat some of it. Good old macaroni cheese. He still wasn't eating much on the Thursday but was a little better than the beginning of the week and by Saturday, he was back to normal.

Development wise, he is getting stronger with walking along when you are holding his hands. He is actually picking up his feet to move them forwards now rather than half him dragging them along and half whoever was holding his hands dragging him forward. I would say he confidently cruises around the furniture now. Not so I notice but you will just see that he was standing in one place one minute and the next he is somewhere else.

He loves climbing the stairs and makes a dash for them whenever he has the opportunity. I'm forever either telling him no and bringing him back to the kitchen or slowly (very slowly) following him up the stairs!

He is still into everything other than his own toys!! His favourite game is currently turning the TV on and off! Not funny. Typically, it happens just when an important bit happens and you miss it! He is probably trying to tell me I'm watching too much telly! Other people's toddlers are just learning how to switch the TV on to watch their favourite kids TV programme.

I took Callum for his 1 year check at the baby clinic. All seems fine. They no longer recalculate his age to be 4 weeks younger (due to being premature) so, where he was pretty much following the 50th centile line (average) or just under, he is now around the 25th centile. He is in proportion though. He is on track with everything else. His speach is fine - they need to be saying at least 2 words by the time he is 1, including animal noises. He does an elephant noise and a snake (and also does monkey now) and also says mumma, dadda though not necessarily in context. I'm pretty sure he says other things as well or has his own words for things and I just don't understand them yet. He says kind of "a-deh" for again. They asked questions about his personality, whether he was sociable and showed signs of being confident and independent. All was fine. So, the conclusion is, we seem to be doing something right so far! :o)

The big news with me - as I am not having much luck finding a part-time IT training job, I'm going to start my own business providing IT Training in my local area. I'm going to target the over 50s to begin with but not limit myself to that. I just think there is a market for that age group at the moment. I have a company name now (not telling you yet), I've bought the domain names and I have a meeting with Business Link next week. I've also prepared and distributed an online survey to research training needs for the over 50s age group. Watch this space!

1 YEAR OLD!!!!

Wow! Callum is actually a year today. Well, technically, this time last year he still wasn't born yet.

Actually, this time last year, I was having just as much trouble sleeping (it is currently 5.30am) as I am today :o(. However, for totally different reasons. The moans and groans of the other ladies in the ante-natal room, the snoring and the mild intermittent pains in my lower back (that bit hasn't changed much!!) were keeping me from sleeping this time last year.

Taking it back a bit further, last year and about 6 hours earlier, my waters broke and I was gripped by fear. What was happening? Will my baby be ok? I'm not ready for this baby yet...I was practically prepared - in that we had loads of equipment and clothes, the nursery was ready despite not needing it for the first couple of months, my hospital bag was even packed but mentally, I still wasn't prepared. I still had 3.5 weeks to go. When people said "not long now" I was still saying "there's still a little way to go and that's fine with me - I'm not ready yet!". Callum had other ideas!

So, off to hospital I went and we were told that that in 24 hours time, we should meet our baby.

I really tried to keep back the tears and shock - I was so scared. Stuart was just so excited. It couldn't be more perfect timing for him. He had had enough of waiting too and was ready to meet our baby.

Stuart was sent home and I had my sleepless night in the ante-natal ward. Then they came and got me about 8.30-9am and took me to the delivery suite. By this time, I was just relieved to get out of the ante-natal ward. Stuart arrived shortly after. My mild back contractions weren't progressing fast enough so by 12noon, they induced me. At 5pm ish, they gave me my first, much appreciated, epidural. A couple of epidurals later and after a lot more pain (despite the epidural) Callum was born at 9.48pm on 2 September.

I spent another 3 days in hospital (4.5 days in total). Although being in hospital isn't great, I really appreciated the time so I could get the extra help and support with breastfeeding. They also took care of him for a bit during the night once or twice so I could get a bit of sleep (though never good sleep with the bright lights and everyone else's babies waking me up). I was also grateful for Stuart coming in each day. It made the days go so much quicker. So, by the time it was home time, I was both relieved, eager to get home and a little bit nervous about us now doing this parenthood thing on our own.

The first 6 weeks, which everyone told us would be the hardest, weren't as bad as I was expecting. I coped pretty well with sleep deprivation and Callum slept so much (though not for long stints) that it was easy to go out if we wanted too. It was after that 6 week period that I started to find it hard. The fact that I had to be tied to Callum all the time with less than an hour window if I wanted to go out without Callum. The lack of sleep was getting to me. I had moved into the spare bedroom when Stuart went back to work and I started to feel like I would never get back to our bed. Callum was still waking very regularly through the night. Breastfeeding plus expressing was hard work.

In the first 5 months I had many ups and downs. It was such an emotional roller-coaster. In some ways, I had coped how I expected - comfortably with the previous experience I had gained looking after young babies. In other ways, I was clueless and, like many, learning by the day, or even by the minute.

Around 4.5-5 months, Callum's sleep routine started to get better and by 5.5 months, I felt we had cracked it. Things started to get easier. By 6 months, Callum was becoming a lot more fun and interesting and I think it was around here that we had our first full night's sleep. It might have even been a little bit earlier.

From this point forward, I really started to enjoy parenthood and was more excited about what each day would bring. Callum was developing more each day and I was finally feeling like I was beginning to know what I was doing.

The weaning was more difficult than I was expecting but I don't regret doing BLW for a minute. Seeing how well he eats now compared to many other babies his age.

Now, my baby is becoming a toddler. He is crawling competently, climbing stairs, pulling himself up to standing and taking his first few wobbly steps with a walker.

The key things I have learnt along the way are:

• RELAX - the more you stress and get worked up about stuff the slower things happen. Everything will happen in its own time and you stressing about it wont make it happen any quicker. If you relax, you might just enjoy life and motherhood a lot more. This is probably the most important one. When I started to relax and not worry about things, life got a lot easier.
• Trust your instincts. Everyone says this but when you are getting so much advice from all corners, if you are reading advice from so called 'experts', it can get confusing to know whether what you are doing is right or whether you should be doing something else. Go with your gut feeling - mother really does know best!
• DON'T read too many books or get obsessed with the 'experts'. You will drive yourself crazy wondering why your baby isn't a textbook baby and, like the previous point, no one will know your baby more than you do.
• Similarly, don't compare your baby to others - its boring to hear it but all babies really are different (I can see the yawns and eye rolls already!)
• Its when you stop caring about whether you are a bad parent that you become a bad parent! We beat ourselves up with guilt worrying about whether we are doing the best by our baby - am I a bad mother? Although we shouldn't be hung up on thinking we are bad parents - when we stop caring about whether we are doing the best by our baby, is when we need to worry. By the very fact that we do care, means we are good parents. Not sure that makes sense? The fact I now know that, according to my own advice, does that now make me a bad parent? Hmm, think this one need rewording...maybe when I've had more sleep and am a bit more with it!

Think they are the main lessons. May add more later.

So, right now, I'm waiting for Callum to wake up so I can bring him into his room, give him his milk and he can open all his presents. I know he wont know much about what is going on but I'm quite excited about it. His first Birthday. Then, this afternoon, a couple of his friends will come over and he can play and eat bad food. And I will reflect and stare in amazement at how much and how quickly my baby is changing into a little boy.

I've made a cake. Not sure I'll do that again in a hurry. It was going to go so much better in my head. Will post pictures later.

11 months, 3 weeks, 1 day

The "1 Year Birthday" is fast approaching. I have sent round an email to his 'friends' to invite them over in the afternoon. So far, only one person has confirmed...could be a quiet affair but we'll have fun regardless.

We've seen the present we are going to buy Callum. There is a garage in Early Learning Centre that matches the magnetic vehicle sets he has already, plus you get an extra 3 cars.

I've practiced making the cake that will be his Birthday cake. I've not iced it, as don't want to waste icing. Plus, it sank, so I wouldn't have been able to ice it. I hope that doesn't happen when I make it for real. It appears I opened the oven door too early. Fingers crossed it all goes well for next week. Otherwise, this could be the last birthday cake I ever make...I'm going with a jungle theme for the icing I think. I was going to do a cat but don't want to do anything too complicated for his first cake. Now, I know you are thinking that a jungle theme must be harder than a cat but I can do the jungle bits all on one round cake whereas, for a cat, I would have to bake an extra cat for ears and a tail. I would also want the icing to be chocolate flavour (chocolate overkill here as sponge cake is chocolate too) and I couldn't find any ready made and I'm not brave enough to make it. I can see it now, it is going to be a disaster. I hope it, at least, tastes nice.

So, our little man and what he's up to.

He gets up a bit of speed now when crawling. Enough to chase after and terrorise Lotté. Found them both under the dining room table tonight, in between the chairs. Lotté looking for the best escape route!

I had thought the stairs were safe but found him a third of the way up them the other day! Now need to watch him. He loves the stairs and heads to them at every chance he gets, whether upstairs or down. My sister recommends only getting a stairgate at the top and teaching him not to go up the stairs without me. Otherwise, whenever we go anywhere without a stairgate, we will have to be up with him every 5 minutes stopping him from climbing them. Not sure how easy this will be but it is worth a try. It is scary that Callum has no awareness of safety on the stairs. How do you teach that at his age. He would very easily get half way up the stairs, get tired and go to just sit back, nearly falling down the stairs. Luckily, I've been behind him whenever he has gone to do this. I think he knows that he has to go down backwards when he is at the top of the stairs. Although, he hasn't quite worked out how to get into position yet. He gets to the top of the stairs and then kind of crawls and shuffles on his bum trying to turn round and then when he is there, he doesn't know what to do next. I still help him to go down, moving his legs for him but will stop that so he works it out for himself.

Callum is pulling himself up to standing all the time now. But only today has he (kind of) worked out how to sit down again - just not very stylishly. He used to stand up and then cry out when he wanted to sit down. Now he sort of throws himself on his bum. He is getting a little bit braver day by day, for example, only holding on with one hand and I don't think it will be long before he is cruising around the furniture. I tried to get him to walk with a doggy walker we have (a walker that looks like a doggy not a tool for taking dogs for walks (oh, how my vocabulary has suffered - doggy is now an everyday word instead of dog!!!)) but he wasn't really sure what to do with it and pulled it towards him instead.

The cutest thing he does at the moment is copy me when I make an elephant sound and a trunk action with my arm. He also hisses like a snake when I do it. He has even done the elephant one when asked when we hadn't been practicing it immediately before - if that makes sense? Going to work on those some more :o)

He is still a little toad when it comes to meal times but I'm trying hard to ignore his throwing food on the floor.

My little man is growing up so quick - he is one next week and I'm still trying to believe I've even had a baby!!!

11 months, 2 weeks

WE HAVE CRAWLING! I REPEAT, WE HAVE CRAWLING!

...and about bloody time too. Well, last Monday, we had our first up on knees and shuffle a couple of steps forward, then Tuesday it was about 3 or 4 shuffles forward, and again on Wednesday. Then, on Thursday, finally, we had our first proper crawl. Both arms and legs slowly moved forward a number of paces. Directly towards the plug sockets! (Must buy plug safety covers!)

Here is the video to prove it...

He is still not speeding around and he crawls about very tentatively. He moves his arms forward first and then moves his knees forward a few spaces. It is very cute to watch. Apparently, they do this for a bit and then they work out it is more efficient to move opposite arm and leg at the same time and then move the other arm and leg.

Everyone warns that your life will never be the same once they are on the move but he actually crawls slower than he rolls at the moment so it is actually easier for the time being. I know that wont last though!

Along with crawling he has also pulled himself up to standing a few times. I think I might have already mentioned him pulling himself up to standing in his cot. He then did it in a ball pool and he did it again over the weekend (I forget where or how). He is still quite shaky on his legs though and not looking like cruising anytime soon. "You've been moaning about him not crawling and then when he finally does, you are straight onto cruising and walking - give the boy a chance" I can hear you shout! I know, I know. I like him crawling, I'm not trying to hurry it, I'm just trying to give you an update! Anyway, he has a couple of times taken a couple of steps holding onto Stuart's hands, but that's it.

We are still waiting for his next lot of teeth to come through. He hasn't been too bad but he woke up a few times last night crying out and has been in a rotten mood this evening.

He was a terror at dinner. He kept taking food in his mouth then spitting it out straight away. So, once it had cooled down enough, I gave him the bowl and spoon to try to feed himself. This cheered him up but then he (accidentally) flicked his bowl onto the floor with his spoon. It was pretty much the entire bowl. I was cross but it wasn't his fault. I started trying to clear it up and managed to salvage some so put it in the bowl in front of him. He proceeded to purposely pick out all the food and drop it on the floor - grrrr! I tried to tell him off and he just laughed at me. Nice to know that he sees me as an authoritative figure! He didn't really eat any of his dinner at all but was more than happy to eat his petit filous! I gave him a couple of oat cakes later. For the record, these taste just like cardboard and are of similar texture! He eats them though. I would see them as punishment!

Not sure if I mentioned but the Childminder we had lined up told me she was stopping childminding - therefore, we were back on the search for a new childminder. She has since told me that she might not be giving it up now but, I've decided to look at others anyway. I'm going to look at a couple of nurseries too.

I saw one last Friday and really liked her. She only has one space (with her own children too) and is happy to be flexible. She doesn't want to childmind full time - i.e. 5 days a week - so me wanting 3 days is ideal for her and she doesn't mind which 3 days or even if they are always the same. This means I can consider contracting. I liked her house. She has guinea pigs and an old little dog - which I don't mind. In fact, I like the idea of Callum being around animals. She has an old pony too that she takes the children to see and her parents have a farm of sorts. She also goes to toddler groups a couple of times a week so they get to socialise/interact with other children. The downsides, for me, are that she charges £2 for cold meals and £2.50 for hot meals. This could work out really expensive if Callum is there for the full day. More expensive than nurseries. I could give him packed lunch to take to avoid one meal and could try to give him breakfast before I drop him off but that will depend on what time I need to be at work. I reckon, at the very least, I will have to pay for one meal. Her fee is £5 per hour....oh, it has just hit me! I'm being soooo silly!!! I was adding the amount onto every hour rather than per day! As you can see, my baby-brain is hanging around! Still could work out as between an extra £2.50 and £6.50 per day. Anyway, the other thing is she charges half price for whether she or we are on holiday. The previous childminder only charged if she was away but we weren't but said she would try to co-ordinate her holidays with ours - therefore being free. I guess this isn't so bad though as some childminders charge either way or full amount if you go away or half if they do. She did say that she charges a half price retainer to keep the place (although she wasn't looking to take anyone on until September, so wouldn't charge until then). Problem being, we can't afford to pay a retainer until I get a job - vicious circle really. I might have to take a chance without the retainer and hope she doesn't get anyone else. Stuart needs to meet her first anyway. She has suggested, if I like her, for all of us to go over at the weekend so we could meet her husband too (although I did meet him while I was there) as, although he wasn't going to be there or minding the children at all, he may pass through so was important we met him. I thought this was a good idea and liked that she suggested it. Guess we need to set this up and then Stuart can see if he is happy with her too.

Still need to sort something out for Callum's birthday - really not sure what to do or whether a party is the best idea. Hmmm, what to do? Stuart's parents are coming up the day before and leaving on his birthday, so that will be something to enjoy. Don't know whether to invite his 'friends' over in the afternoon...

11 months, 1 week

Weight - having a 'blip' - a very big one. Completely off the diet wagon and desperately need to get back on it...and I was getting so close to my first target as well.

So then, the Little Man! What is he up to?

Well, still no crawling yet though he is getting closer and closer. He gets on all fours now and has a couple of times shuffled a knee or two forward before flopping on his tummy so he is nearly there. I saw it for the first time yesterday when he was reaching for the stairs. Stuart saw it this morning when he was reaching for the biscuit tin. However, we haven't both seen it at the same time!

He is really into pointing at everything and saying "deh deh" as if demanding to touch it or an explanation of what it is. We are trying to give an answer to everything he points at. It can get a bit repetitive but is cute too.

Rather scarily, Callum managed to pull himself up to standing in his cot yesterday. I had sat him in his cot while I ran his bath and when I came in, he was standing up holding onto the side of the cot. Definitely need to keep the drop rail raised.

All this movement is making us aware of the need for childproofing the house. We aren't going to go too mad, I don't think. Probably just get a stair gate at the top of the stairs and plug covers for the accessible plugs. The area that worries me is the top banister. The bars are quite wide apart and Callum could easily fit between them. He only has to see Lotté jump through them a couple of times and decide to copy or follow. He has already made a bee-line to them a couple of times. Not really sure what to do about it though. Maybe see if we can find some plastic sheeting or something that we can temporarily fit to them. Don't think I am going to put any locks on kitchen cupboard doors or drawers yet. Most of the cupboards contain harmless contents and unbreakables. Just one reachable cupboard has crockery in and I could think about moving that if he takes an interest in it. The cleaning stuff is all in a larder type cupboard which he wont be able to open for quite a few years. I guess we may think again if he starts pulling drawers open and learns how to open the fridge or freezer but I'm keen to teach him 'no' if possible - not that he takes any notice of my 'no' yet - he still goes after the video/sky box/PlayStation at every opportunity!

He has learnt to open the cupboards of the sideboard in the lounge. He likes to pull all the dvds and cds out - makes a change from pulling the CDs out of the CD rack!

I've been trying to teach Callum to load his spoon himself when eating. I don't do it with every meal but, where possible, I try to encourage it. It makes for LOTS of mess but, if I don't give him the opportunity to try, he will never learn. He does make a good effort and even manages to eat something. He does mix using the spoon with using his hands and a bit of playing with his hands too but, as long as he is eating, that's fine. He is already very good at getting the food to his mouth, whether in his hand or on a spoon, from the BLW. He is being a bit weird with how he eats at the moment though. He will put something in his mouth, spit it out again so it falls in his bib, then picks it out of his bib and eats it again. Sometimes he will pick food off his plate and put it in his bib, then pick it out of his bib to eat it. I was worried about the spitting out of the food at first - was this some kind of baby bulimia? He would get the taste of the food then spit it out. Then I realised he would only spit out bits that were too big for his mouth. If they were smaller bits, he would eat them fine. I'm trying not to cut things up into small pieces as he has done so well up until now with managing the size of the food himself. I'm hoping it is just a 'phase' he is going through. Like I said before, as long as he is eating some food and not going hungry, I should just go with it. I do need to buy some more bibs, and better spoons and forks though - especially if I am trying to encourage him to use his cutlery himself.

Can't believe it is going to be his 1 year birthday in a few weeks. I really need to get some invitations and start organising something. I can't find any invitations that I like at the moment and they are so expensive. About £3 something for 8-10. To be honest, 10 will probably be enough! How many friends can he have at 1? Need to make a list of who to invite.

I want to make a cake for him too - eek! My big cake making skills haven't been that great in the past. Edible, yes! Aesthetically pleasing, erm, not really! Trying to get ideas on how to decorate it. I'm much better at smaller cakes - though there is still lots of room for improvement there.

It is hard trying to think of suitable present to buy him. We are probably going to buy him a car garage. I have thought of a couple of other things like a bike/trike or little trampoline but considering he is not even crawling yet, let alone walking, I think we will save those for Christmas which will only be another few months away.

My friend's baby is due in the next few weeks so I got Callum's old clothes out of the loft to sort out the neutral clothes to lend her. Was so amazing to see all the small tiny baby and newborn clothes he used to wear and to look at him now. It prompted me to look at photos of when he was born and the first couple of months - to think that it is the same baby. My baby is rapidly becoming a little boy.

Despite growing into a little boy, it is nice that Callum hasn't grown out of giving me cuddles. In fact, he often gives me more now that he seems to understand them...and big open mouth kisses too...could do with the kisses being a little less slobbery! When he cuddles and kisses, he makes this kind of ahhhhhhh noise - so sweet. Someone once told me that boys are more cuddly than girls - I'm looking forward to that!