Waiting For the Pot to Boil: 40 weeks, 4 days

OK, now I’m in danger of getting fed up! Its funny how something takes over in your head. If I think about it, I’ve no real need to be fed up. I’m still shit scared of the actual event and its hard to pinpoint when my mentality changed from not being in a hurry and not being ‘ready’ to being more than ready and then getting to a point where I no longer think about what is going to happen and just want to get on with it!

I think part of it is other people’s impatience and everyone making you think you ‘should’ feel fed up – they say “don’t worry, it wont be long” or “you must be getting really fed up now” so you start to think you should be. Plus the “not long to go now” phrase kind of makes you get your hopes up that its imminent…then 2 more weeks pass without anything! I don’t mind people asking, after all, I get excited about other people and have asked many a friend at the end of their pregnancy the same questions they have asked me. I’m sure I have even uttered the words “not long now” too. I know they are just excited for me and that’s great, so if you are reading this, please don’t stop asking.

What also contributes are the false starts. About 3 times, I’ve geared myself up to think “this is it” – after each of the sweeps (of which I’ve had 2) I’ve felt awful. My hips and body ache and it makes me feel miserable, I’ve felt lucky to get to bedtime but fully expect to be woken in the night in the throes of labour. This then means I spend the whole night in a half sleep where every twinge makes me stir thinking this is it then nothing, every ‘dribble’ down below I think my waters are breaking but no. I then wake the next day feel absolutely normal again and it makes me feel like it was a wasted opportunity. That it should’ve happened but now I’ve ‘missed my chance’.

Finally, I’m concerned about this baby being born too close to Callum’s birthday, 2 September. I’m worried our children are going to hate us for the continuous joint birthday parties. But after talking this through with my Dad, why am I worried? Does this really matter? Perhaps it will be better. They aren’t going to be sharing presents as they’ll be 4 years apart in age and ones a boy and the other a girl! Maybe I need to get over this fear. It may mean Callum might not get much of a birthday this year but this shouldn’t matter for the future really!

Because of this, I’ve decided to change my way of thinking. My new ‘Due Date is my Induction Date – 29 August. I’ll not ‘expect’ her to arrive before then but if she does, then great, at least I know I’m mentally ready! And perhaps I’ll stop sitting around just waiting for it to happen – I’m sure its much more likely to happen if I’m distracted and not thinking about it. After all, remember the great adage “A watched pot never boils!”

Locked & Loaded: 40 weeks, 2 days

I had my next MW appointment today for another sweep and to book in my induction.

My BP was really good and no other problems. When she did the sweep, she said the baby was fully engaged, I was 1.5-2 cm dilated, cervix soft & central, waters bulging, braxton hicks occurring! So, seems we are all systems go and are just waiting for the signal!

Because everything is going well, the induction isn’t booked until 29th August in the hope that I’ll go into labour naturally before then. I need to call Poole ante-natal ward on 28th at 7am to confirm all is well and get details of what I need to do etc.

My MW said if I didn’t go into labour before next Tuesday I was to text her so she could get me in again for another sweep and then another on the Thursday if still nothing. Technically, this is one extra sweep than I should have as they normally only do 3 but she wasn’t counting the one at the hospital (as it didn’t do anything) and she wants to give me the best possible chance before the induction.

The sweep itself was a little less uncomfortable than last time and, compared to baby’s movements at the moment which are like someone scratching away at me from the inside with a knitting needle, was a walk in the park!

So still we wait! And bounce! And wait!

I’m very emotional today. Burst into tears this morning because I couldn’t find my knickers! Its a sorry state of affairs when a girl cries over knickers! Then, because I was grumpy and miserable, this affected Callum’s lovely mood and he became emotional too. I felt awful that by the time we got to nursery we were both in tears! I hate it when my moods affect his, especially when he started the morning so well.

Callum is being very sweet at the moment with this morning getting straight up and cleaning his teeth, bringing his clothes to me to get dressed and then making himself his own breakfast. He is so proud of himself. Then yesterday, he went down and made me breakfast in bed of cold dry toast (its the thought that counts!), the day before he cleaned his teeth and got himself dressed in his favourite attire of his England football kit! I hope this keeps up when the baby does arrive but doing all this and being so good then me being all grumpy with him makes me feel so bad and guilty. Rotten Mummy – I need to try and make it up to him tonight!

Finally, I just feel the need to log my weight gain before I have the baby. Amazingly, I’ve still put on less than 2 stone this pregnancy! 1 stone, 10 lb (probably 11 now as weighed a couple of days ago). That feels like an achievable weight to lose after I’ve had the baby!

Happy Due Date

So I have made it to my Due Date – something I’ve been curious about for the past 8.5 months and I must admit its a bit anti-climatic! Everything feels just the same!

I had another hospital appointment today (and one on Monday just gone) and as my BP is thankfully behaving itself, they are happy to leave it to my Community Midwife to do another sweep and book in my induction when I have my next appointment on Friday (17th August).

I was kind of hoping they’d book it in today as it would be nice to know it wasn’t too far away but I know, if baby isn’t ready, the whole induction experience is less likely to be effective anyway so best give baby a chance to come when she is ready.

I used my dowsing crystal the other day to try to predict when baby will arrive. It has predicted 18 August which would make a lot of sense if the MW does another sweep on the 17th and this one works. I’d be happy with that. For one, it is convenient as it is a weekend, he he, but also she would only be 3 days overdue so not too much waiting around (or too big ) and there are still a couple of weeks before Callum’s Birthday. That is my main concern about going too long after today is that baby will be born only a few days before Callum’s birthday. Its going to be hard not doing joint birthdays as it is but I imagine it will be inevitable if they are only a few days apart! Plus it would also be near the bank holiday – there would be both plus and minus points for a bank holiday birthday.

I’ve no more signs that baby’s arrival is imminent, just the usual regular braxton hicks, so for the time being it is just continue to wait and see.

I’m not fed up as such or taking any desperate steps to try to get baby out yet – just the odd bit of bouncing on the ball…and the fact that nearly every dinner is spicy is purely just coincidental (ahem) but I am starting to fantasise what it will be like to bend in the middle again!

Beep Beep and Sweep, 39 Weeks

Thought I’d just do a quick update following today’s hospital appointment further to my last blog post.

I was having more tightenings last night similar in strength to Friday but nothing more than that. Kept me awake some of the night though as every time baby moved it seemed to kick things off.

Todays appointment was booked for 2.30pm. I had Callum’s swimming lesson in the morning, then we went for lunch before heading for my appointment. After being so good on Monday, Callum was being a little monkey today and my patience was very thin. I was worried that that in itself was enough to raise the blood pressure.

Thankfully, we didn’t have to wait as long as last time despite the worrying signs of it taking me about 5-10 minutes of driving round the car park to get parked and then the antenatal waiting room being really busy.

The blood pressure checks were similar to Monday, the first one being done manually and recording as high and then the other two being done by the automatic machine and being under the highest acceptable level (140/90). She wouldn’t tell me what the first one was, she just said she didn’t want to record it as it was rather high.

I think the other two were 137/88 and 127/86.

After the BP checks, she went to have a word with the consultant about what the ‘plan of action’ was going to be. When she came back she said that they wanted to see if things kicked off on their own so she was going to give me a sweep* to see if that helped. They would also get me in for BP checks twice over the next week and then they’d make a decision whether to induce me on my due date based on how my BP was behaving. Of course, if nothing had kicked off on its own before then.

I wasn’t expecting the sweep and as I had a bad experience of internal examinations when being induced with Callum I was a little nervous about it but it was probably best I didn’t know about it in advanced as I would have just worried about it. It wasn’t the most pleasant thing and was quite uncomfortable/painful but no where near as bad as the internal I had in the delivery suite with Callum. Thankfully, I was curtained off for it too with another lady distracting Callum. Not something I really wanted him to be witness too.

Since then, nothing has really changed or kick started. No increase in tightenings, still just the odd one here and there. My right leg aches like hell and feels like its about to fall off but not really sure I can attribute that to the sweep or being a ‘sign’!

I’m not expecting much to happen. I have my next community MW appointment tomorrow at the doctors and imagine I’ll be having the same false starts over the weekend.

 

* What is a sweep? – A membrane sweep is where a Midwife ‘sweeps’ a finger around your cervix to hopefully separate the membranes around your baby from your cervix. This process releases a hormone which can help to kick-start labour within the following 48 hours.

Weird happenings: 38 weeks, 5 days

Ok, so seems baby may have read my last blog as the afternoon after I wrote it I started feeling weird. I couldn't quite work out why. I guess I was experiencing some tightenings or braxton hicks but it wasn't a strong enough feeling to put my finger on. I had a midwife appointment already booked in so thought I'd see what she said.

When I got to the appointment the mw, as is the norm, asked how I was feeling and I explained I felt weird. She took my blood pressure and said it was a bit high (156/97). It had been behaving so well and last reading was 126/72 so this was quite a jump. She asked if I had any headaches, which I had, but I had also had a head cold and had suspected the cold to be the cause. She listened to baby, checked my wee etc, all the usual things and all was well. She also took some blood then tested again. It was still high but had come down a bit (150/92). She decided to make an appointment for me at the hospital for Monday (today) for another BP/urine check and told me to take it easy & be 'vigilant' for other symptoms over the weekend.

The rest of that afternoon/evening I continued to feel weird & have the tightenings. When they got to a strength I felt I could time they were about 10-12 mins apart but still very mild. I tried to have an early night but it's hard to sleep when you are anticipating 'action'! The tightenings continued until about midnight but then must have eased off as I fell asleep and slept well for the rest of the night.

My parents were booked in to come over for the weekend anyway because my dad was doing some work in the nursery so they decided to stay over Saturday night just in case & brought clothes with them for the Monday too. This meant my mum took good care of me & Callum over the weekend and I spent most if it with my feet up and taking it easy. I felt a little weird but only had the odd tightening here and there.

As there were no affirmative signs of labour, and i was feeling more normal, they went home sunday night.

Today was my hospital appointment and as I thought I'd be in and out in no time at all, I took Callum with me. Unfortunately, there was an emergency that morning (I do hope all was ok), all the appointments had been pushed back so it was over an hour before I was seen. As the appointment was for 12noon, I had taken Callum some lunch with me (but just a pack of crisps for me) which helped pass some time plus I managed to distract him looking at maps and in the play area but, in truth, Callum was a absolute angel!

I was then in the room for a little over an hour going through all the various checks & being hooked up to the baby heart rate monitor and Callum was good again throughout showing a little concern for me worried when I had to lie down on the bed and have the monitor attached. The lady/doctor/midwife (whoever she was) was full of praise for him, I was so proud! The parking ticket said we were in for 2hrs 38 mins in total.

Anyway, BP was high when I first got there with the lower number still over 90 so she checked everything else & hooked me up to the monitor. All came back good. Again she asked about headaches and as the cold had now gone but i was still experiencing mild intermittent headaches, i did mention them to her. They are not enough to need a paracetemol but enough to make me think about it. Once on the monitor, we had to wait a while for baby to move as she was having a sleepy moment. After the cold water didn't work (me drinking it, nothing more bizarre!) I shuffled over to my side & she eventually started to wiggle.

More bloods were taken (I've since heard they were clear) and another appointment was booked in for wednesday. My subsequent BP checks showed an improvement and were good by the end. She was quite unsure what to do with me as I was neither perfectly ok or definitely something wrong, I was (in her words) whooly! So Wednesday's appointment was booked as a precaution and to see the consultant with the aim of preparing a plan of action as she didn't think they should let me go too far overdue!

I strongly believe that I won't develop pre-eclampsia (and she was inclined to agree) but that raised BP is just my bodies way of reacting to labour. As I've been typing I can again feel my BP is high (the weird feeling is back) and I've had a few more tightenings again but still nothing strong. I'm just extremely tired! I've had a few really good night's sleep now so not expecting to feel this tired!

I can see this weird feeling and tightenings coming and going quite regularly over the next few days or until it really does kick off.

I'm in two minds how I feel if they decide to induce me. Part of me will feel safe in that I can relate it to my last labour/birth, it's what I know so I'm happy with that. But also part of me is curious to experience what it is like to naturally go into labour while at home etc.

I guess only time will tell and, as always, what will be will be.

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Preparing the nest! 38 weeks, 2 days

Ahhhh, finally got here. Yesterday my maternity leave truly began. It was the first day with no Callum (nursery) and no work when I could finally give into those nesting urges!

Not sure how much I believe in nesting or that this is in fact nesting as I don't feel any more energised to get jobs done it is just trying to get anything done with a little person around is impossible. So, I've been waiting for this time (yesterday and today at least) to finally tackle things that have been irritating me as well as trying to squeeze in a bit of feet up time. I'll confess that the feet up time yesterday was enforced by my back screaming at me to stop but it feels so good to get the stuff done that I wanted to before baby arrives.

Yesterday was spent putting things back where they belong. This is what normally happens when Callum is with me.

• I pick up a toy car in the kitchen and return it to Callum's room
• I see some art bits in Callum's room that belong in the art box downstairs
• As I walk out bedroom with art stuff, Callum picks up the car I've just returned to his room & follows me driving it down the stairs
• I return the art stuff to the art box, clear Callum's art table of the magazines & crappy free toys (about 3 toy cameras - can they really not be any more imaginative?) that have been sat there untouched for 3 weeks, throwing them in the bin/recycling.
• Cries from Callum: "they're mine!"
• I agree he can choose 1 free camera to keep and choose the magazine that has the most activities still to do
• I leave him looking at the magazine holding tightly onto the camera, car discarded in the dining room
• I walk into lounge & tidy sofa cushions putting throw cushions back on the sofa
• Callum walks into lounge, leaving magazine on thebart table in dining room, drops camera toy on lounge floor and starts throwing himself on the sofas flinging throw cushions around!
• I walk into the kitchen & find he has retrieved the magazines & toy cameras from the bin & left them on the breakfast bar!

This continues throughout my attempt to tidy and how much have I actually achieved so far? It is a case of 2 steps forward 1 step back.

 

So it was amazing to be able to get so much done yesterday and is also surprising how quickly it builds up in little piles all over the house in different rooms. Unable to achieve anything usually, I choose instead to just gather the stuff together in little piles but it never really makes its way home! I even managed to sort the garage a little and move stuff to the loft out of the way (before you all panic that I've been up a ladder in my 'condition' our loft space is in the eaves of the third floor so just entails a little bit of crawling (good for baby's positioning!!). Also, the actual putting stuff in the loft had to be done today cos it was at that point yesterday that my back said "no more!".

 

Now today I did the loft bits & cleaned the oven but now I'm chilling with a cup of tea & enjoying the Olympics. What a great time to be on maternity leave. No need to endure the 'joys' of daytime tv which is enough to motivate anyone into doing chores, instead I want to sit & watch the Olympics.

 

I have a midwife appointment later and may pop into town briefly but then that's it!

 

Once these 2 days are over with I can say I'm ready! Any more days I get to rest are a bonus but I just wanted to have at least 2 days to myself.

 

I've actually had a rotten cold too & been feeling sorry for myself and a little worried that I may end up going into labour unable to breathe! Although was reassured reading old wives tails and anecdotal stories of how your body won't let you go into labour until the day you feel better. I've missed the full moon (last night) and judging how I feel today, I reckon I'll be over the cold tomorrow.

 

So watch this space!

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Hospital bags

In case anyone finds it helpful, I thought I would post my hospital bag lists. What I found useful last time was to pack one bag for labour then a second bag for stay in hospital, which Stuart went and collected from the car (taking the other back) after baby was born. This was particularly helpful being as I stayed in hospital for a few nights after Callum was born. I guess it's less useful if you go home the same day as you go in but as it worked for me last time, I've done the same this time.

Others do a bag for mum & a bag for baby but that would mean keeping 2 bags handy. Still, keeping the balance between being prepared for everything & packing light is a challenge. I did have to sit on my hospital stay bag to zip it up and couldn't fit in my top n tail pots.

So here they are:

Labour:


(* items to keep for hospital stay if not used)

2 tankini tops (for pool)

2 black t-shirts

1 black pj bottoms

Baby's first outfit: vest, sleepsuit, nappy, mittens, hat, booties in plastic bag marked. One for tiny baby & one for newborn. (remove tiny baby if get to due date)

1 muslin*

1 small light blanket*

iPod & speakers

2 puzzle books & pens*

2 lucozade sports drinks (& 2 cans red bull for s)

Snacks: Jaffa cakes, crisps, cashews, haribo*

Camera*

Lip balm

Hair band & clips

Change for parking etc

Pack of tissues

Slippers*

Couple of maternity pads

Mini Shower gel

Hospital stay (me)

Trackie top

2 nursing tops

Comfy trousers

2 nursing bras

Thick/slipper socks

4-5 pairs of large, cheap black knickers

Dark, comfy pjs

Light material dressing gown

Dark towel

1-2 pack maternity pads

6 pairs of breast pads

Nipple shields

Toiletries: face wipes, mascara, eye-liner, moisturising cream/oil, lansinoh, mini deodorant, tissues, toothbrush, comb, mini toothpaste, mini face wash, mini showergel, mini shampoo, mini conditioner, mini bath soak, lip balm

iPad/iPod charger

Camera charger

Phone charger

Hospital stay (baby):

Going home outfit (bagged & labelled)

10 nappies

Nappy sacks

2 bibs

2 instant milk bottles

Blanket

1-2 muslins

2 vests

2 sleep suits

1 cardi

2 hats

3 scratch mits

2 pairs of booties

1 towel

Cotton wool

2 empty, washed muller corner pots, 1 labelled top and 1 labelled toe

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Floored! 37 weeks (full term)

Who the hell moved the floor so far away from my hands. I swear, either my legs have got longer or my arms have got shorter. And just to add insult to injury some cruel twisted unseen force is having a laugh at me making me drop everything. I just had to pick up about 20 pegs with my toes, and thank god my phone has a protective cover on it as it spends more time on the floor than in my hand! I'll pick one thing up that I just dropped and drop the other thing I was previously still holding!

Then of course there is Callum. As fast as I tidy or pick things up off the floor he is trailing behind me dropping stuff or unloading more toys! I can't keep up & its killing me & my bump attempting too. I give up! As I speak, I'm trying not to twitch looking at the lego car that used to be which is currently still residing on the floor, discarded this morning by the little man himself! I just know that at some point in the not too distant future I'm going to tread on the retched thing and curse that I didn't pick it up but my bump just can't face another squeeze!

In my next superhuman life I'll be sure to pick up the super power of telekenesis!

I could go on with my rant by telling you of the inconvenience of appliances being below waist height, such as the washing machine & dishwasher, but I remember doing that last pregnancy so I won't bore you with the repetition!

Anyway, in other news, I had my last scan today. All was well with the growth of the baby, blood pressure was fine and I've been discharged by the consultant to the care of the midwife. So being as today baby is full term at 37 weeks, I'm technically all set to go. Except my mind hasn't accepted that this baby has to come out yet and I feel like this pregnancy can just keep going...forever...maybe!

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I'm still here!!! 36 weeks, 5 days

So this is the most pregnant I've ever been! 36+3 came and went with waters remaining intact! We had visitors (again, like last time) so I'm glad history didn't repeat itself. To top it all off, the summer has finally arrived too!

I'm getting bored of saying my back hurts, now, it is pretty much from the moment I get up until the moment I go to bed but I've learnt to live with it. However, that aside, I'm feeling pretty good. I'm lucky that I don't suffer too much with the heat as long as I don't do too much and I keep my pace at snail miles an hour. It's all about keeping cool really and drinking lots of fluid.

I'm trying really hard to take things easier even when it goes against every grain in my body. For example, I was a good girl today and refrained from mowing the lawn, instead I enlisted the help of my nephew, helping him out with a spot of pocket money too.

I'm on better track for being more prepared for baby arriving now as well. I bit the bullet and bought a few outstanding bits today. For the pushchair, the zip on the cosy toe has broken & I can't find the 5 point harness. I rang Maclaren & the harness will be £45 and the cosy toe £35. Yeah, that's not going to happen. I instead bought a generic cosy toe from Mothercare in the sale for £14.50 and must have another thorough look for the harness. I bought a bouncy chair from Mothercare too. Just their cheapest one as i remember my NCT friends rated its super bounce and I'm really not fussed by all the added vibrate features etc. the bounce is what's important for me. I purchased Mothercare's version of the Buggy Board, the Hop N. Before my Mothercare trip, I ventured in to boots to get newborn bottle teats and the milk starter pack that you can get...just in case breast feeding goes to pot from the off. It just takes the pressure off a bit. They are great packs, 6 little sterile bottles of ready made milk.

While on the subject of Boots, they have these mini super-cute trolleys which I assume are solely for kiddiewinks so Callum was thrilled to be able to help me put things into the trolly & pushing it around for me, then scanning it through the check outs. So sweet!

Think that leaves me with the sling, which a friend is selling me second hand, and a playmat. Whoop! Oh and the change mat. I've struggled with that one as I wanted one with butterflies on to match the nursery theme but amazingly have been unable to find one. However, a colleague at work came up with the excellent idea of getting a plain one and decorating it with stickers. So now I'm looking for a completely plain pink or white one and some suitable butterfly stickers.

The nursery should be being finished on weekend of 4 August when my dad does the coving and I can put the wall bits up. Hopefully we can get the last of Callum's bedroom furniture built too either this or next weekend.

It's my last 2 days at work this week and my social plans are being kept to an absolute minimum so hoping I can start getting the final bits done and start relaxing!

So still not 'ready' for baby to arrive but getting there so bring on full term, bring on due date, I'm nearly ready for you but please, baby, stay in there a little longer as I so desperately want some feet up time too!

And if you haven't already done so, don't forget to make your predictions on my earlier post, here.

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Rules on the run up to D-Day - 36 weeks

I am curious, what 'rules' did you set, if any, to anyone, in the last few weeks of pregnancy.

Stuart & I agreed both last time and this time that he would stop drinking alcohol so he would be ok to drive to the hospital. Labour & birth being as unpredictable as it is, you can't really guess when it will happen and therefore know when it is ok to drink and when it isn't. This was proved last time when we decided when Stuart's brother visited that it was unlikely to be that weekend as it was still only 36 weeks that he'd be ok to drink. HAHAHAHA, yeah, needless to say, it all happened that weekend!

This time Stuart originally set an over-ambitious target for not drinking at about 34 weeks. Although he kind of cut down, maybe knocking off one or two drinking night's a week he didn't stick to a completely t-total lifestyle. I would have suggested he stop at 35 weeks and 1 day (being as 35 weeks was when he was best man at his friends wedding). Anyway, I turned 36 weeks today, 3 days before the equivalent time to when my waters broke & Stuart is out drinking (second time to drink alcohol this week). He has an excuse, he always has an excuse but to me it feels like he has his priorities wrong. We already learnt before that babies and bodies don't care if it's the last time you'll see someone again (in a work capacity not a close friend or even just a friend really), they don't care if you had a hard day, they don't care if everyone else is drinking and you don't want to be left out or even if someone twisted your arm. It's a game of chance, last time, we didn't lose as Stuart was unlikely to be over the limit but we certainly didn't risk it and get away with it either.

Don't get me wrong, if Stuart understood moderation, it wouldn't be an issue. I would trust that he'd have one or two pints then walk away or switch to soft drinks. But that's not Stuart, and he doesn't do moderation!

So I'm disappointed! But I do question whether I expect too much! After all, I could go overdue & it could be another 6 weeks before baby arrives. What are the chances of what happened last time happening again? About 5% according to my consultant. Is the odd night here and there really going to hurt?

So, I'm keen to hear your views, what 'rules' did you and your other half have in place, did you both stick to them etc. please share your opinions & stories.

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Bump photoshoot with DK Capture

When I was pregnant with Callum, Stuart bought me a photoshoot experience gift. I thought about using it after baby was born but I didn't have long before I had to use it by and not knowing how long it would take me to loose the baby weight, or if I would ever lose it, I decided to use it for a pregnancy shoot. Considering it took me about 2 years to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight it was the right decision. We came away with 2 photos - the deal was to get one free framed photo but think we negotiated 2 photos without the frame!

Anyway, despite the fact they are still without a frame & are waiting to be shown off on a wall somewhere, I thought I'd like to do it again this time round. Originally my reasons were partly because I hated my pregnancy body! Now that might sound a bit masochistic but I thought I'd much prefer to look back at my body through professional photos & remembering it for the lovely image of what it represented (my unborn baby girl) rather than looking back at my body negatively. I know, it's an odd theory but it works for me...Debbie logic! However, as it turns out, I've learnt recently to like (love still being a bit strong) my pregnancy body a lot more than I did! Even with stretch marks appearing a week before the shoot date, although disappointed me, it didn't put me off.

The shoot was booked for Saturday 14 July (weekend just gone) so I did a bit of research beforehand to find some examples of poses I wanted to try. I was keen to have different ones to what I had done last time. I was also interested in getting some with Callum kissing my bump & to try some 'family' shots. I found a couple of poses using a sheet which I quite liked so sent the example ones to the photographer.

I took a couple of costume changes but unfortunately couldn't find a suitable sheet so had to go with the material the company provided which was pink chiffon. I did say I thought this would be ok but in hindsight I think I would have preferred a white satin sheet.

We turned up late after a number of delays getting to the venue but the photographer was understanding and also let us overrun quite a bit. I didn't feel rushed at all.

We did a few photos of me fully clothed in leggings and a fitted top first, just me on my own. Then a few with me in a pair of white skinny jeans and white bra. Then we 'tried' to include Callum! He predictively wasn't having any of it. He just wanted daddy and wouldn't perform. We eventually had to get daddy involved in the photos first and then try with all of us. Amazingly, the photographer still managed to get some good shots, even when Callum was reaching out for daddy.

After the family shots, we went for the sheet. Bra and jeans came off so I was just in my knickers & the sheet. There were a couple taken over my boobs & bump and then some taken with the sheet under my bump with my hands covering my boobs. Having seen the photos, I don't see much value in the latter ones & would have liked more taken with the sheet over bump & boobs but think there are a couple i like. I'd like to see them in black & white first & there's a good one where the colours have been played with that looks good.

Being that the shoot was only on Saturday just gone and today being Tuesday, I was very excited to receive an email today with link attached to say the photos are ready to view. Now we just have the tough task of trying to choose a couple. Again, we get one photo included in the price & Stuart has said he'll buy me another for my birthday.

Once I'm back blogging on my laptop and have decided on the photos I'll share with you both the Callum bump & Millie bump photos.

The deal we went for was for pregnancy photos then baby's first year which consists of 3 shoots within the first 12 months. Each shoot includes a 10x8 photo and there is no need to pre-book the baby photoshoots just ring up & book when we'd like one. An hour's studio time would have been £59 which is what the pregnancy shoot would've been. To upgrade to the baby's first year photos too was only an extra £20 which I think was a really good deal.

More details about DK capture can be found here. All opinions are my own, I have not been asked to write a review and have not received any fee etc for doing so (in fact they don't even know I'm writing this).


 

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Place your bets please!

I am now opening the books on your predictions for baby! We are pretty sure it's a girl (after 2 scans) and the EDD is 15 August. So the predictions are for:

• Date of arrival
• Time of arrival
• Weight

As of today I am 34 weeks, 6 days.

 

A bit of history for those that don't know:


This is my second child. My son, Callum (nearly 4) was born at 36+4 after an all day hike around London, 2 spicy meals and a short jog to the Chinese. My waters broke late that night & because my bp was high & my contractions weren't progressing enough, they decided to induce me the next day. I was induced about 12 noon & Callum was born about 9:48pm weighing 5lb15oz. Full details of birth number 1 can be found here.

So far bp is normal - last reading was 130/78 and there are no obvious signs that baby will come early this time.

Please ask should you have any questions that may assist you with your prediction.

My own prediction is:

• DOA: 12 August
  
• T: 9:14am
• W: 7lb2oz

Please add your predictions to the comments section.

Bets are now........OPEN!!!

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Time to love my baby bump - 33 weeks, 4 days

It's only taken 8 months but I'm finally happy with my pregnant body...when I have clothes on (still don't recognise myself naked!)...and as long as I'm not sat down!

I quite like the shape of my bump, it's position, it's size. I think stepping on the scales the other day then following it up with the growth scan has helped with that. This is all good timing cos I have a bump photo shoot booked for in 2 weeks. I need to start looking at examples of poses so I can go with some to try...if anyone has seen some nice ones that aren't the regular ones you always see, please let me know.

I'm geneally feeling pretty good. I still tire really easily, particularly by about 4 pm & I don't have to do much before my back & bump start to ache but I know if I listen to my body & rest, both of these symptoms improve.

I have a lot of preparation to do still, mentally & practically, and I am definitely not ready for this baby to arrive yet.

I still find it weird when overdue pregnant ladies start pulling out their hair in frustration waiting for their babies to start showing signs of their imminent arrival. I never got to this stage with Callum, I was still very much of the mind that the time was approaching too quickly & I wasn't ready. Pretty much the same as I feel now. It's hard to imagine the feeling of desperation for the baby to arrive & for that feeling to ever outweigh the fear & nervousness that the thought of birth & new born sleepless nights still evokes now. I'm sure I'll get there though & will laugh in that all knowing cynical way when I read this back at 42 weeks!

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Help, I'm not fat enough! - 33 weeks, 1 day

I had the first of two extra growth scans today which couldn't have come at a better time as, get this, today I was worried I had not put on enough weight!!! Yes, you read that right, not enough weight!! There's no pleasing some people is there!

Basically, I weighed myself at 28 weeks and had put on 1 stone 5 lb since finding out I was pregnant. At this stage I didn't know if this was good or bad but it is normal, from that point as I entered the third trimester, to put on an average of 1 lb a week until the birth. That'd put me at aproximately 2 stone 3 lb if I was to give birth on my due date.

I was then advised at my consultant appointment following that to start taking low dose aspirin once a day. I read somewhere that taking aspirin in your third trimester could lead to the baby not growing properly but as I'd also be having 2 growth scans, I knew if there were any issues they'd be picked up.

Then today I step on the scales again & find I've only put on a lb since 28 weeks! I was expecting 5 lb. so I was worried! My bump has only grown about a centimetre during that time too.

So I was quite nervous as I went in for the scan but quite quickly my fears were proved to be unfounded as the measurements in the scan were all shown to be in the normal range. They checked the fluid around the baby and again all was well. Liver appeared to be fine and the umbilical artery doing what it was supposed to do. More Good news, my bouncing on my exercise ball had paid off as baby was no longer oblique/transverse like she was at my last mw appointment but was nicely head down with her limbs all over to my right. Apparently, she will most likely stay there now although may flip from right to left...I'm pretty sure she has been flipping back and forth for most of the afternoon.

After the scan I went for my clinic appointment with the mw & consultant. The mw checked my blood pressure & the first reading was 142/86 which had jumped up quite a lot since my last appointment of 122/70, but she wasn't concerned & I knew I had been worried about the scan so knew that could be affecting it. Still, she took it again and it was fractionally lower a 136/84. She told me that my urine sample was being sent off as it did show there were a few white blood cells present which indicated the start of a urine infection. This made sense as I had been feeling some sharp pains in my bladder area of late & suspected this was the cause. She said there was also a little bit of glucose but was a low reading so likely just that I'd had something sugary.

The consultant was rather lovely & reminded me of a better looking Hugh Grant a lot more confident than the last one I had seen, was professional, and came across very knowledgeable and understanding. He wasn't concerned about my blood pressure or any of the results. He made sure I was happy without any concerns. He said, because my high bp was quite a late onset last time that there was only a 5% chance of it happening again and, unless there was a clear symptom which indicated a risk or there was a worry at the next growth scan, they will not look to induce me...unless of course I go the other way & am so overdue that they induce me....which you just know is going to happen!!

I asked about what would happen if my waters broke early again. He said if it was before 35 weeks (so in the next couple of weeks...eek!) then it was normal that they would let me go a bit longer..until either I got to 35/36 weeks or labour came on automatically as it was more important that the baby got to near enough term/fully mature but if was after this time they would wait 24-36 hours to see of I progressed naturally before inducing me as then an infection would be a bigger risk. I guess this would still depend on bp and other symptoms.

So...pretty much, all good! Oh....and baby is still looking like a little girl so no sex change that we are aware of!

I can just be happy in the knowledge that I haven't put on as much weight this time so should hopefully lose it quicker after birth too...*shovels another mouthful of chocolate sundae into mouth*


I now have weekly midwife checks and another growth scan and consultant appointment in 4 weeks.

Current pregnancy ramblings - 32 weeks, 5 days

As the weeks get closer to D-day (due day/delivery day), I'm getting increasingly nervous I'm going to have another early baby. Callum wasn't 'that' early, he was just short of term, and all signs this pregnancy say I'm going to go full term. I'll most likely be joining the pregnant, overdue & fed-up club and end up being induced 14 days late! But there are also many similarities between this pregnancy and my last and what if this one comes earlier than the last?

I'm nervous that I am working up until 2.5 weeks before due date (1 week after the time Callum was born) and even if the baby is only a few days early, that doesn't give me much time to rest before baby number 2 comes. I'm really starting to get tired now so it does concern me that I might need some rest time.

Every little twinge or tightening makes me think 'please not now, not yet'. I've packed a lot of my hospital bag now but still have a lot to sort out for it. I'm starting to think of practical things like carrying my notes with me wherever I go and even the car seat!

I have the first of 2 extra scans on Thursday so hopefully the results of that will help me relax a bit more but I guess it's no real surprise I'm dreaming lots at the moment and often having nightmares.

I keep telling myself to chill & on the surface I am but I must acknowledge that this is how I am feeling inside!

Pregnancy Puts Years on Your Body! 26 Weeks, 3 Days

I feel like an 80 year old! What has happened to me?

I mowed the front & back lawn & repotted a couple of plants today and can now hardly walk. Once I sit down, I need a hoist to get me up again and then standing straight from a sitting position takes a litre of oil on the joints!

Add that to the scatter brain and lack of memory! The moaning (like now!) and my lack of patience reminds me of those grannies on the bus or at the bus stop…watch out for “back in my day…” and “the youth of today….” comments!

I’m sure I’ve noticed another few grey hairs sneaking in. Hell, I’ve even dyed my hair purple today! (don’t worry its Plum not purple rinse…yet!)

I’m not going to even mention my bladder and bowel movements…oh, oops, I just have! Well, I’ll spare you from the details…

I’ve bleeding gums! (not sure that’s an symptom of old age but thought I’d throw it in there!)

Now…if I could get those meals on wheels and the home help now please, that’d be grand!

Can you believe I’ve still got another 14 weeks to go (maybe)….but then…shit! I’ve only got another 14 weeks to go! Ahhhhhhhhhh! Panic!!!!!!

Who’s That Funny Girl in That Mirror There? 25 Weeks

I’m really not liking my pregnant body at the moment! I know I should and I’m trying to but I look in the mirror, particularly at me naked, and I’m almost repulsed by what I see. That sounds strong I know but its my first and natural reaction.

I’m by no means svelte and I have lots of bumps in places I’d rather not have places – some are down to pregnancy but mostly they are down to my diet and lack of exercise (she says as she shovels another spoonful of Nutella into her gob!) but this isn’t just a vanity thing! I know, with a bit of hard work, I can fix that after baby!

Its that I don’t recognise my own body – its not me.

I don’t mind ‘so much’ when I’m clothed, although I don’t like looking at my bumpy self, but naked….shiver! My tummy looks funny, my bellybutton looks odd…I just look…wrong!

I have no issues at looking at anyone else naked or other naked bumps, in fact, I often think a pregnant naked lady is beautiful – so why don’t I like it on me?

I remember when my feet first started to swell when I was pregnant with Callum. No one else could notice the difference, they weren’t hugely swollen, but I looked down at my feet and they weren’t my feet. I gasped and said “These aren’t my feet – my feet look funny, they don’t look like my own”. Its weird! This is similar – I look at my body and its not my body!

Thankfully, the next day after giving birth, I looked at my feet and the swelling had already gone down and I recognised my feet again – it was then that I knew I wasn’t going mad (too late for that!) as now they looked perfectly fine again – in fact they looked like my feet but skinnier!

I was the same with my pregnant bump last time too, so it shouldn’t be a surprise. I had hoped that when Stuart bought me a photo shoot gift experience for my Birthday at about 6.5-7 months pregnant, that it would help me to change my view on my body and get me used to seeing myself in a different light. I am so pleased I got the photos done and definitely want to have some bump photos taken this time too. I can look at them and appreciate them as photos of a pregnant woman but when I think of them as me I still feel uncomfortable looking at them and don’t recognise them as my body.

There’s no solution to it I suppose – apart from to stop looking at myself in the mirror!

Full Term Baby Here We Come! 24 Weeks, 5 Days

Because of my history of high blood pressure with Callum, the Midwife hadbooked me an extra appointment than is normal for a second pregnancy.

She called the other week to say she could no longer make the appointment and recommended I make the appointment with the Dr instead for BP and Urine check. This I did and the appointment was Wednesday just gone!

It was good news – whoop, whoop! My BP was 124/78 which I think is the best it’s been for ages – years probably! In addition, there were no signs of either protein or sugars in my Urine! I didn’t have evidence of protein last time but I was worried about the sugars – the amount of chocolate and sweet stuff I’ve been eating recently, I was fully expecting this to be high so good stuff!

This really does feel me with confidence that I will go full term with this baby!

There are chances, of course (there are always chances) that this one could come just as early or earlier and, as the Dr reminded me, its not for certain that my high BP led to my waters breaking early – and I really didn’t do myself any favours that day after my hike around London, two meals of spicy food and a short jog (as much as an 8 month pregnant lady can jog) from the car to the Chinese, it really wasn’t surprising – but it could’ve been a factor and anything that points away from this is reassuring to me. The biggest fear, of course, is baby coming even earlier!

All this being said, you bet your life if 15 August arrives without baby making an appearance, I’m booking a trip to London to hike around half the city with a spicy pizza for lunch and a spicy Chinese for dinner (whether I puke it up or not!!!) – although I wouldn’t want a premature baby if I can help it, there were advantages in Callum’s case of only being just shy of the 37 weeks (he was born about 36+4 – which they class as 4 weeks prem), he was a good weight (5lb 15oz) both in terms of delivery for me and healthy for him, apart from a spot of jaundice and low blood sugars, he didn’t have any health risks or need any special care.

So the advantages were:

• His size! It was painful enough squeezing this little one out…I do not want to experience much bigger!! Also, I do believe his size was why I didn’t tear.
• I never got to that stage where I felt bored, frustrated and over with it all in terms of the pregnancy. When I hear others talk about those last few weeks of pregnancy, I’m always relieved I didn’t have to experience it – especially going over due and having the constant phonecalls of “I hadn’t heard from you for 8 hours are you OK, is it happening now?”. In contrast, when people asked me how long to go they’d often pipe up with “ooh, not long now” and I’d be panicked and say I wasn’t ready yet. I wasn’t ready (mentally – physically, I’d been ready for weeks with my hospital bag packed, nursery decorated etc!) and didn’t want the last few weeks to go quicker than I was ready for!
• I’m pretty sure the first few weeks were easier for us because all Callum did was sleep all the time. Everyone says the first 6 weeks are the hardest – I wondered what they were all going on about. Then 6 weeks hit. Just as everyone else said things get harder, I was a mess!

So, as soon as I reach term – bring on the pineapple, long walks, spicy curries, sex, acupuncture, reflexology, evening primrose, raspberry leaf tea, nipple stimulation, caster oil – this baby will be coming out!

For anyone who hasn’t already read my birth story and has a few hours to kill, you can find it here.

All things Pregnancy, 23 Weeks, 5 Days

Just a general pregnancy update from me.

It took a while into the second trimester but I’ve been feeling really well and much more like the normal me recently. So much so that I often get a little shock when I catch a glance of myself in the mirror or lay down in bed at night to see a protruding bump!

Then someone asked me how I was feeling on Saturday morning so I said, truthfully, that I was feeling good and would be happy if I could stay feeling like this for the remainder of the pregnancy. Why did I say that? I clearly jinxed myself! By the end of the day I felt like I’d morphed into an old woman. It started lunchtime – I’d gone in my friend’s' car (we had our two friends and their children visiting for the night) to show her where the supermarket & pharmacy were. When we got back and I went to get out the car I got a shooting pain through my pelvis like I was all out of line. I couldn’t put any weight on my right leg without crying out in pain! I could hardly walk for a bit. Then every time I went to stand after sitting down for a while I could hardly stand straight and felt all stiff. By the end of the day I felt like I’d been doing a vigorous exercise class and it was the morning after!

I guess I need to take that as my warning to slow down! I’d spent 1.5 days spring cleaning that week and perhaps these aches and pains were a result of that!

I guess my pelvis is starting to move about now too – although I thought any significant moves would be later along in the pg in the third trimester! I guess not!

I have a few things on my mind at the moment relating to delivery. First one being the hospital we go to. I’m not feeling the confidence with Poole Hospital. If they’d allow tours or for me to see the labour ward, perhaps I’d feel a bit different but considering I wont ever even see the hospital until its time to give birth as my appointments are all held at Bournemouth Hospital (a lovely hospital but only a MW-led unit so no drugs!!! – of the type I’d be after anyway!), I’m really not liking what I’m hearing from other people about the place. I’ve heard it resembling a bunker on more than one occasion.

The other thing I’m not happy about in going there is that they don’t offer mobile epidurals. I really don’t want to be restricted to lying on my back for the duration of labour and have the joy of being fitted with a catheter which, from what I understand, means you are more likely to spend longer in hospital. I had a mobile epidural with Callum but, although I was pretty restricted to the bed because of being hooked up to bp monitors etc,, and although the top ups failed, I was able to wiggle around and go to the toilet if I wanted. I’d still rather have a mobile epidural where the top ups don’t work rather than a full on epidural that glues me to the bed unable to move.

Going by my last birth plan, I’m sure after saying all this, that will be exactly what happens despite my best intentions – I get glued to a bed on my back with a catheter – as labours and births are so unpredictable and so often does not go according to plan but the best I can do is make efforts in the right direction to getting the plan I want.

I did think that Poole or Bournemouth were my only options. However, I’ve since heard I could go to Salisbury!

So, I’m going to contact Salisbury hospital to discuss what options there are and, if they offer a tour, I’m going to take a look.

Salisbury is further away to travel than Poole – 30 mins opposed to 15-20 but its worth looking into!

I guess another thing that must be on my mind according to my dream last night is breastfeeding and getting baby to latch on…to both breasts!

Last time, Callum and I took until the last night/day in hospital (C was born on Tuesday & we left on Friday) until we both finally got it and we never really got the hang of my right boob as I have a slightly inverted/flat nipple! But I must remember i) it was my first time breastfeeding a baby; ii) Callum was early and it is common for early babies to struggle with latching on at first; and iii) I was too self-conscious to ask for help,. This time I’ll have the advantage of having done it before, I’m more determined to ask for help if I need it and go to support groups and, all things being well, this one might have a better chance of getting it from the off…! We wont know until we get there.

But there have been things I’ve learnt, from my own experience and that of others which I’m going to try. The support groups being one of them but also, to start using Linsinoh right from the start (it was my saviour last time when I discovered it and, a little secret for those that don’t know, its fantastic at protecting sore little bums at night with bad nappy rash!!!) and I will try Medela nipple shields on recommendation from a friend who also didn’t take to breastfeeding immediately and tried several brands.

Whoever said breastfeeding is natural is lying! I hate that saying as it makes you think that its easy and both your baby and your body will know instantly what to do without any assistance – often it is not that easy and requires patience, persistence and a high pain threshold to cope with the needle sharp pains in your nipples!!!

Which might make you wonder why I am bothering to try again – I know, it surprised me but I do think I stopped last time just as I was getting into the flow of it (pardon the pun) and, if I do manage to get this baby feeding off both boobs then I think it will be worth the effort and initial pain (that does get better) in the beginning!

Positives I did learn from last time were that I’m not going to wait for 6 weeks until my flow is established before expressing and bottle feeding – I do believe Callum never had a problem switching to bottle because he had both breast & bottle from the start. This is also what I understand from other people’s experiences too and those that solely breastfed (from breast) and didn’t use a bottle at all until much later often had a much more difficult transition period – some babies never mastering a bottle! I want Stuart to share in the feeding so I can have a break from time to time!

Finally, to end on a high, Stuart finally felt the baby move last night – woohooooooo! Kicks and wiggles are in full swing as I am typing now! I think I am calling her Wiggles or Wiggly while she is in the womb as that seems to be what comes to mind when I talk about her.

Putting a price on fun!

Last night I had a rare opportunity to go out for the night. Well, we both did, Stuart and I. It was a work event and as it fell on the Thursday before Good Friday we thought we’d get a babysitter and both go. I had already been thinking of getting a babysitter so we can go out for dinner anyway so it seemed like a good idea.

A contributing factor (though of course not the main or only reason) for us moving to Bournemouth was to be near family. We realised how hard it is to bring up children when you don’t have your family near by. And, of course, a big benefit of being near them is the opportunity of a free babysitter!

However, this doesn’t happen as often or as easily as you’d think. Firstly, there is now my brother and family, my sister and family and ourselves all down this way, all sharing my parents’ kind services. I am transported back to being a kid again when I saw my brother and sister always asking for lifts from my parents so I rarely did but when I did it was always on a night they were busy themselves or just wanted a night off to themselves. My parents are wonderful and my Mum will always put herself out to help us when she can and I am incredibly grateful for all she does but I also appreciate that looking after kids when you are at retirement age is hard work. Not to mention, she is recovering from an ankle operation. Plus I don’t like to take her for granted so I hate asking her. I get nervous and fear her saying no. Not because of the rejection but because I know that if she says no she will feel bad herself for not being able to help and I just feel so much guilt!

But it isn’t just down to my parents, my sister-in-law loves having Callum and has always said if ever we need a babysitter to ask. She has looked after Callum a couple of times. But this weekend is her Birthday weekend so I don’t like to ask. Plus, she has only asked us once if we can help out and we’ve had to say no because its our anniversary. I’d really like to be able to offer our services to her before I feel like we are taking her for granted too.

And then there is my sister. I know she will help out when she can but she has 3 children already so I hate to burden her with another!

In addition to all the above and my ‘mental’ issues with each situation, Thursday is a work day. Each of our babysitting options really require us getting Callum to their house…probably for similar reasons to mentioned above. Maybe more my guilt than there inability but if someone is doing us a favour, I like to make it as easy as possible for them. Being as we were working during the day and then we are off on a day trip today, making picking up this morning difficult, it wasn’t going to be a viable solution to ask family.

So,that leaves the familiar method to many – the Babysitter!

We have a benefit over when we were in Surrey as now we have the nursery staff on hand. Great! Callum’s old nursery didn’t allow it. This one, the Managers don’t encourage it, but it is up to the individual nursery nurses if they want to do it so they stay out of it. This is brilliant and I was thrilled when I found out. I asked how much and the lady I spoke to said usually around £6 but, again it was down to the individual.

When we asked the first time, I think we paid £7 per hour for 4 hours then rounded it up a couple of pound to £30.

Last night I made the mistake of forgetting to ask until we were out! I sent the text thinking the worst it would be was about £8. I was wrong…back comes the text….

“Ern, its entirely up to you. I normally get given about £10 an hour but like I said its entirely up to you.”

What could I say…you’ve probably sussed out by now I’m a wimp! Read above again if you don’t believe me. I couldn’t say when we were already out…”actually, we are only willing to pay you £8”.

So, £10 a bloody hour it was – that’s £40 for 4 hours!!!! On top of whatever Stuart and I each pay out for our drinks etc because we are both out!!! Nowadays, if I spent £40 on drinks alone, I’d think I had had an expensive night but now we have the £40 (at least) on top of whatever we spend!! That makes for one very expensive night. OK, I didn’t actually spend much myself…about £10, but assuming Stuart (who stayed out for about 4 hours longer than I) spent £50 getting rounds, food, entrance fee to clubs etc (so a conservative guess) we are looking at £100 for us both to go out for ONE night!!!!

So then there’s the added pressure to enjoy myself to make that money worthwhile.

I’m sat, pregnant, drinking soft drinks, with 95% of the people I’m out with outside on the balcony smoking in the freezing cold, while I’m inside with the 1 or 2 other people being deafened by a live band unable to hear a word the other two are saying.

Was it worth the money? NO! Was I enjoying myself? Not as much as I would like, no!

It was with a heavy heart I went home at 10.30pm (the original plan being to leave at 11.30) and thought of what I’d much rather be spending the money on.

Then I was in bed by 11.30pm thinking about how I’d just like to go out on a date with my husband and no one else! My new year’s resolution was to go out on a date with Stuart  once a month. We are now in April and how often has that happened? Zero! A big ZERO times! Everytime we get an opportunity to go out it is for someone else’s celebration and we have to use up one of our babysitting chips.

Also, I haven’t been out on my own without Stuart since about October when I went to stay with a friend. Everytime an event is planned for just me, its cancelled.

I’m feeling a bit over this going out lark! Looks like I’m destined for nights in front of the tv with my fluffy socks and chocolate for the time being! Feeling old and pregnant!