Fasten Your Seatbelts, Hold On Tight – Birth Story Part II

Shortly after Louise, my second midwife Pawla arrived. I got the impression Pawla was the senior midwife and Louise the junior but both very capable and very lovely – I like lovely! Looking in my notes, I can confirm it says ST M next to Louise’s name so suggests that she was a student. She was very confident, I just thought she was newly qualified.

Firstly, I was hooked up to the monitors and my BP checked. BP was fine and, apart from the monitor being a pain not picking up enough of the heartbeat unless permanently held and then baby being mischievous kicking or moving away from the monitor, they managed keep track and everything was calm. At one point she suggested I might like to lay on my side – anything to get off my back! One thing I didn’t want was to be on my back, my labour pains were in my back so it was making them hurt more and I knew it was the worst position to be in. So, when she suggested this I jumped (well more of a slow painful shuffle) at the chance but when I went on my side, baby’s heart rate slowed so I had to turn back. Thankfully, it returned to normal when I went back so she just didn’t want to be on that side. I found this strange as that was the position I always found most comfy when laying down or sleeping.

I had originally said, and it was in my notes, that I had wanted to try the pool. I had also mentioned this when I rang the hospital from home but at no point was this mentioned. Admittedly, I didn’t bring it up either but assume it was because baby needed to be monitored and they wouldn’t have been able to do so if I was in the pool. Perhaps I still should have asked.

They examined me at 8.15am. I was 4-4.5cm dilated. I was mildly disappointed to not be further at this stage but pleased I was far enough along that I didn’t have to go for any walks considering I ‘faked’ my panting! Stuart was still recording my contractions at this point and they were now every 2 minutes and lasting over a minute.

From here it all gets a bit blurry. Contractions started to come thick and fast and they kept commenting how I wasn’t getting much break from them. Everytime I moved, it would also trigger another contraction. They kept trying to get me to have some gas & air but as it was I was keeping the sick bowl to hand and the last thing I wanted near me was something that was only going to make me feel more sick and not even for the benefit of taking the pain away.

Then they tried to get me to have pethidine because I was tensing up through each contraction. They said it would help to relax me. Pethidine was the one thing I said on my birth plan that I didn’t want as I was concerned about what got through to baby and baby being sleepy when born. The fact it can have an effect on feeding was also a reason too. I said as such but they said the number of babies that experienced this was so low and not something they had ever seen. Personally, I was worried about feeling out of control. I asked Stuart what he thought as I was having his baby too – he had a say in what drugs I took if they affected his baby. He left it up to me. In the end I gave in. Ouch, did the injection sting – it was in the thigh. It must’ve been ouchy to notice the pain even when in labour! They said it took about 15 minutes to take affect. In the meantime, I remember trying to relax more for each contraction hoping it would help – sometimes it did, sometimes it didn’t. I would shake my head from side to side and close my eyes to get through each contraction. I waited and waited for the pethidine to take affect then started to ask, when does the pain go away? “It doesn’t take the pain away” they then said….What? Hang on?  You convinced me to take a drug I didn’t want and it wont even take the pain away!!!! “It relaxes you and takes you away so you can deal with the pain better but the pain doesn’t go away!” Nooooooooooooo! Shortly after, I was begging for an epidural “Please make it stop, please take the pain away, please can I have an epidural”. They agreed I could have an epidural and said they would go and get the card thing for me to look at but they suspected I may even be ready to push and therefore it be too late. They wanted to examine me first. They asked if I felt the urge to push and I had to confess that I was getting it, yes.

Sometime around this point the room filled with doctors. I’ve no idea what they were doing there, I think they may have asked me questions I can’t remember. From my memory, I think there were about 6 extra people in the room but I really can’t be sure. It is all a bit of a blur and I have since asked Stuart and he isn’t sure either. He said they either came in because I wanted an epidural or because they were just doing the rounds.

Anyway, the MWs examined me! It was hell! Every time she felt a particular area, I had a really intense contraction. However, she confirmed, yes, I was fully dilated, it was now time to push and yes, definitely too late for an epidural – I was doing this the painful way, all the way!

I requested to go on all fours, I just needed to get off my back and as on my side wasn’t allowed (as it distressed baby) which was the best position for me with Callum, I asked to try all fours. They agreed and instantly, there was relief in my back. Clearly I was still in a lot of pain but it made the next bit more manageable otherwise I’m not sure I would have got through it (clearly I would’ve but that’s how I felt at the precise time). I felt my body pushing and there was very little I could do about it. According to my notes I started pushing at 9.20am. After a couple of pushes, they told me to pant and pant I did. I think it took a couple of contractions of panting for the head to come out and then another for the body. Again, instant relief. My head cleared, I caught my breath and I felt like a knew woman! Sort of!

I noticed she wasn’t crying instantly but I wasn’t worried. I could hear them talking to the baby in calm voices and welcoming her to the world so felt confident she was ok and pretty soon she let out a wail. My notes confirmed she had a little tactile stimulation before she cried. Apparently, she did have the cord around her neck but looped around the back not the front but it may have been this that was causing her heart rate to dip and perhaps she was compressing it when on my side.

I had requested that she be cleaned before being given to me for skin to skin, which they did and I was presented with my beautiful baby girl, Millie May born at 9.31am on Monday 20 July, weighing (which they did a little later) a perfect 7lb 11oz (or 3.48 kg). And she is absolutely perfect.

We were given some bonding tine for a while when Stuart also had some skin to skin time. We tried to breastfeed and it took a little while and a little help from the midwife but eventually she fed and for a good 20 minutes. During this time they bought me some tea and toast and Stuart and I scoffed jaffa cakes from my little used labouring hospital bag!

I was then allowed to shower and discharged straight from the delivery room a little around 12 so home in time for lunch! As we pulled up outside the house, ready to surprise my mum that we were home already, I joked that it was like we had just popped out to the shops to get a baby! I am sure that is what Callum thought too when we introduced him to his new baby sister!

Congratulations to ChelseaMamma for guessing  the correct date, Kilburina for correct weight and I get closest time!

Pop goes the Weasel – Birth Story Part I: 40 weeks, 5 days

Well, my last post appears to have done the trick as my beautiful little girl has arrived and here is how it happened! I’m a waffler so I’ll do it in instalments (nothing to do with adding drama and suspense, no I wouldn’t do that to you...).

After a lovely day celebrating Callum’s friend’s 4th birthday at her party followed by a chilled evening, I went to bed and slept really well until I needed a wee at 4.30am. No signs, twinges, I just went for a wee then back to bed. I had just started to enter the world of snooze again when I felt a pop in my bump like a mattress spring pinging back to place. I quickly prodded Stuart awake as I waited for the big gush of waters to come forth. Stuart stirred “Is something happening?”. But nothing, no big gush, no trickle of water, no contractions…perhaps I’d imagined it or perhaps just an enthusiastic kick from the little lady. I went to the loo again to see if my waters started to trickle…not really. I found myself standing in the ensuite over the security of the tiled floor too nervous to head back to bed in case the gush decided to occur! According to my twitter tweet, this was about 5am.

After 5-10 minutes, this was getting silly and I doubted I was going to go back to sleep so I left Stuart trying to get in a few more zeds, while I went down to bounce on my ball for a bit as I had started to get mild tightenings in my back. I’d bought my ipad down with me with Contract Master loaded ready to start recording. Eventually, I went to the loo again, and there was a trickle of waters tinged pink (this is normal).

Half hour later and contractions were definitely there but had jumped straight in at a regular 2-3 minutes and lasting 35-40 seconds. I had expected them to come in at 10 minutes apart and knew that when they reached about 5 minutes apart and were lasting for a minute then you were to go to the hospital. These contractions weren’t following that pattern! What should I do? They weren’t too strong yet and I could easily talk through them. The TV documentaries had taught me they wouldn’t let you in the maternity ward if you could still speak through your contractions so I guessed I should just hold on. I thought it was about time I got Stuart up and we should think about getting my parents to come over. If contractions were already this close if they got stronger, there wasn’t going to be much time to get to the hospital! By now it was 5.45am.

Stuart called my parents and downloaded the contraction master app to his iphone so he could help with the recording as I kept messing it up. I also called the hospital to warn them I’d be coming in at some point explaining waters had broken and contractions had started, were close together but not yet strong. They told me to call back when they ramped up a gear or got closer together (how close did they want them to be? I ignored this bit and would call when they intensified).

My parents arrived around 6.30am so I called the hospital about 6.45. Contractions were still 2 minutes apart and were getting stronger. I could still talk through them but decided to ‘play it up a bit’ otherwise they wouldn’t let me go in. I knew you should labour as long as possible at home and could understand how going to hospital could slow things down but we had a 25ish minute drive to the hospital and I didn’t want to risk not making it! I craftily added in a pant half way through a contraction while speaking to the MW on the other end of the phone. She noted it and said I could go in (yay). So off we went, around 7am, kissing my parents goodbye (while Callum still snoozed without a care in the world upstairs!). I checked Stuart now knew how to get to the hospital as we hadn’t managed to drive to Poole without getting lost yet! He assured me he did.

Every corner or jolt was quite painful when I got a contraction and the car journey did affect the timings. They weren’t so frequent now – often between 3 and 4 minutes, but were lasting longer – for about 1.5 minutes.

Sure enough, after a while, I noted the scenery outside he car and suspected we had gone past the hospital! Yep! We had got lost again and needed to back track somewhat! Doh!

We got to the hospital just before 7.30 (thankfully traffic was minimal due to time of day). I then had a little panic that I had somehow managed to misplace my phone – one minute it was in my hand, the next not – I had no memory of what I had actually done with it though – I had only walked from the car to the hospital doors! After a silly panic of trying to find it and Stuart going back & forth to the car to look, I found it – I had put it in my hospital bag. So, off we went to maternity ward.

We buzzed but no one came to the door until eventually a cleaner opened it and let us in!!!! Not really correct protocol! We headed to the reception desk and got a surprised look from the lady behind wondering how we had got in! We explained who we were and she showed us into our delivery suite (I love how they try to make it sound so much nicer by calling it a suite! – clinical delivery room doesn’t have the same appeal!). After what felt like quite a long while a Midwife came to see us and explained that they were just about to have a change of shift so she wouldn’t examine me but would start off procedures by asking me some questions while she made her notes. Sure enough, shortly after the first of my 2 actual midwives came in to take over – Louise. By now it must have been around 7.45am and I was panting through contractions for real by now.

Hold on to your seatbelts now and try not to blink for part two – To be continued.

Rules on the run up to D-Day - 36 weeks

I am curious, what 'rules' did you set, if any, to anyone, in the last few weeks of pregnancy.

Stuart & I agreed both last time and this time that he would stop drinking alcohol so he would be ok to drive to the hospital. Labour & birth being as unpredictable as it is, you can't really guess when it will happen and therefore know when it is ok to drink and when it isn't. This was proved last time when we decided when Stuart's brother visited that it was unlikely to be that weekend as it was still only 36 weeks that he'd be ok to drink. HAHAHAHA, yeah, needless to say, it all happened that weekend!

This time Stuart originally set an over-ambitious target for not drinking at about 34 weeks. Although he kind of cut down, maybe knocking off one or two drinking night's a week he didn't stick to a completely t-total lifestyle. I would have suggested he stop at 35 weeks and 1 day (being as 35 weeks was when he was best man at his friends wedding). Anyway, I turned 36 weeks today, 3 days before the equivalent time to when my waters broke & Stuart is out drinking (second time to drink alcohol this week). He has an excuse, he always has an excuse but to me it feels like he has his priorities wrong. We already learnt before that babies and bodies don't care if it's the last time you'll see someone again (in a work capacity not a close friend or even just a friend really), they don't care if you had a hard day, they don't care if everyone else is drinking and you don't want to be left out or even if someone twisted your arm. It's a game of chance, last time, we didn't lose as Stuart was unlikely to be over the limit but we certainly didn't risk it and get away with it either.

Don't get me wrong, if Stuart understood moderation, it wouldn't be an issue. I would trust that he'd have one or two pints then walk away or switch to soft drinks. But that's not Stuart, and he doesn't do moderation!

So I'm disappointed! But I do question whether I expect too much! After all, I could go overdue & it could be another 6 weeks before baby arrives. What are the chances of what happened last time happening again? About 5% according to my consultant. Is the odd night here and there really going to hurt?

So, I'm keen to hear your views, what 'rules' did you and your other half have in place, did you both stick to them etc. please share your opinions & stories.

Posted with Blogsy

Full Term Baby Here We Come! 24 Weeks, 5 Days

Because of my history of high blood pressure with Callum, the Midwife hadbooked me an extra appointment than is normal for a second pregnancy.

She called the other week to say she could no longer make the appointment and recommended I make the appointment with the Dr instead for BP and Urine check. This I did and the appointment was Wednesday just gone!

It was good news – whoop, whoop! My BP was 124/78 which I think is the best it’s been for ages – years probably! In addition, there were no signs of either protein or sugars in my Urine! I didn’t have evidence of protein last time but I was worried about the sugars – the amount of chocolate and sweet stuff I’ve been eating recently, I was fully expecting this to be high so good stuff!

This really does feel me with confidence that I will go full term with this baby!

There are chances, of course (there are always chances) that this one could come just as early or earlier and, as the Dr reminded me, its not for certain that my high BP led to my waters breaking early – and I really didn’t do myself any favours that day after my hike around London, two meals of spicy food and a short jog (as much as an 8 month pregnant lady can jog) from the car to the Chinese, it really wasn’t surprising – but it could’ve been a factor and anything that points away from this is reassuring to me. The biggest fear, of course, is baby coming even earlier!

All this being said, you bet your life if 15 August arrives without baby making an appearance, I’m booking a trip to London to hike around half the city with a spicy pizza for lunch and a spicy Chinese for dinner (whether I puke it up or not!!!) – although I wouldn’t want a premature baby if I can help it, there were advantages in Callum’s case of only being just shy of the 37 weeks (he was born about 36+4 – which they class as 4 weeks prem), he was a good weight (5lb 15oz) both in terms of delivery for me and healthy for him, apart from a spot of jaundice and low blood sugars, he didn’t have any health risks or need any special care.

So the advantages were:

• His size! It was painful enough squeezing this little one out…I do not want to experience much bigger!! Also, I do believe his size was why I didn’t tear.
• I never got to that stage where I felt bored, frustrated and over with it all in terms of the pregnancy. When I hear others talk about those last few weeks of pregnancy, I’m always relieved I didn’t have to experience it – especially going over due and having the constant phonecalls of “I hadn’t heard from you for 8 hours are you OK, is it happening now?”. In contrast, when people asked me how long to go they’d often pipe up with “ooh, not long now” and I’d be panicked and say I wasn’t ready yet. I wasn’t ready (mentally – physically, I’d been ready for weeks with my hospital bag packed, nursery decorated etc!) and didn’t want the last few weeks to go quicker than I was ready for!
• I’m pretty sure the first few weeks were easier for us because all Callum did was sleep all the time. Everyone says the first 6 weeks are the hardest – I wondered what they were all going on about. Then 6 weeks hit. Just as everyone else said things get harder, I was a mess!

So, as soon as I reach term – bring on the pineapple, long walks, spicy curries, sex, acupuncture, reflexology, evening primrose, raspberry leaf tea, nipple stimulation, caster oil – this baby will be coming out!

For anyone who hasn’t already read my birth story and has a few hours to kill, you can find it here.

All things Pregnancy, 23 Weeks, 5 Days

Just a general pregnancy update from me.

It took a while into the second trimester but I’ve been feeling really well and much more like the normal me recently. So much so that I often get a little shock when I catch a glance of myself in the mirror or lay down in bed at night to see a protruding bump!

Then someone asked me how I was feeling on Saturday morning so I said, truthfully, that I was feeling good and would be happy if I could stay feeling like this for the remainder of the pregnancy. Why did I say that? I clearly jinxed myself! By the end of the day I felt like I’d morphed into an old woman. It started lunchtime – I’d gone in my friend’s' car (we had our two friends and their children visiting for the night) to show her where the supermarket & pharmacy were. When we got back and I went to get out the car I got a shooting pain through my pelvis like I was all out of line. I couldn’t put any weight on my right leg without crying out in pain! I could hardly walk for a bit. Then every time I went to stand after sitting down for a while I could hardly stand straight and felt all stiff. By the end of the day I felt like I’d been doing a vigorous exercise class and it was the morning after!

I guess I need to take that as my warning to slow down! I’d spent 1.5 days spring cleaning that week and perhaps these aches and pains were a result of that!

I guess my pelvis is starting to move about now too – although I thought any significant moves would be later along in the pg in the third trimester! I guess not!

I have a few things on my mind at the moment relating to delivery. First one being the hospital we go to. I’m not feeling the confidence with Poole Hospital. If they’d allow tours or for me to see the labour ward, perhaps I’d feel a bit different but considering I wont ever even see the hospital until its time to give birth as my appointments are all held at Bournemouth Hospital (a lovely hospital but only a MW-led unit so no drugs!!! – of the type I’d be after anyway!), I’m really not liking what I’m hearing from other people about the place. I’ve heard it resembling a bunker on more than one occasion.

The other thing I’m not happy about in going there is that they don’t offer mobile epidurals. I really don’t want to be restricted to lying on my back for the duration of labour and have the joy of being fitted with a catheter which, from what I understand, means you are more likely to spend longer in hospital. I had a mobile epidural with Callum but, although I was pretty restricted to the bed because of being hooked up to bp monitors etc,, and although the top ups failed, I was able to wiggle around and go to the toilet if I wanted. I’d still rather have a mobile epidural where the top ups don’t work rather than a full on epidural that glues me to the bed unable to move.

Going by my last birth plan, I’m sure after saying all this, that will be exactly what happens despite my best intentions – I get glued to a bed on my back with a catheter – as labours and births are so unpredictable and so often does not go according to plan but the best I can do is make efforts in the right direction to getting the plan I want.

I did think that Poole or Bournemouth were my only options. However, I’ve since heard I could go to Salisbury!

So, I’m going to contact Salisbury hospital to discuss what options there are and, if they offer a tour, I’m going to take a look.

Salisbury is further away to travel than Poole – 30 mins opposed to 15-20 but its worth looking into!

I guess another thing that must be on my mind according to my dream last night is breastfeeding and getting baby to latch on…to both breasts!

Last time, Callum and I took until the last night/day in hospital (C was born on Tuesday & we left on Friday) until we both finally got it and we never really got the hang of my right boob as I have a slightly inverted/flat nipple! But I must remember i) it was my first time breastfeeding a baby; ii) Callum was early and it is common for early babies to struggle with latching on at first; and iii) I was too self-conscious to ask for help,. This time I’ll have the advantage of having done it before, I’m more determined to ask for help if I need it and go to support groups and, all things being well, this one might have a better chance of getting it from the off…! We wont know until we get there.

But there have been things I’ve learnt, from my own experience and that of others which I’m going to try. The support groups being one of them but also, to start using Linsinoh right from the start (it was my saviour last time when I discovered it and, a little secret for those that don’t know, its fantastic at protecting sore little bums at night with bad nappy rash!!!) and I will try Medela nipple shields on recommendation from a friend who also didn’t take to breastfeeding immediately and tried several brands.

Whoever said breastfeeding is natural is lying! I hate that saying as it makes you think that its easy and both your baby and your body will know instantly what to do without any assistance – often it is not that easy and requires patience, persistence and a high pain threshold to cope with the needle sharp pains in your nipples!!!

Which might make you wonder why I am bothering to try again – I know, it surprised me but I do think I stopped last time just as I was getting into the flow of it (pardon the pun) and, if I do manage to get this baby feeding off both boobs then I think it will be worth the effort and initial pain (that does get better) in the beginning!

Positives I did learn from last time were that I’m not going to wait for 6 weeks until my flow is established before expressing and bottle feeding – I do believe Callum never had a problem switching to bottle because he had both breast & bottle from the start. This is also what I understand from other people’s experiences too and those that solely breastfed (from breast) and didn’t use a bottle at all until much later often had a much more difficult transition period – some babies never mastering a bottle! I want Stuart to share in the feeding so I can have a break from time to time!

Finally, to end on a high, Stuart finally felt the baby move last night – woohooooooo! Kicks and wiggles are in full swing as I am typing now! I think I am calling her Wiggles or Wiggly while she is in the womb as that seems to be what comes to mind when I talk about her.